for maximum efficacy of charm, utter this in the dead of night lying down on a sheet of camel skin soaked in goat’s blood, on top of One Tree Hill*



may those who
cannot praise
and can only bark dispraise
of my writings, songs and posts
may they all
become loose of mind;
and may such
in the middle of a crowd of fanatics
suddenly lose their pants or tops;
and inexplicably become illiterate
when they are to sit for exams;
and may they who cannot
say: “You are the best! You are the best!” -
may these henceforth never be capable
of saying anything at all!


O, as swineherds
in days of yore
became Court Poets
by Divine Grace –
may all those who don’t
appreciate my writings and posts
may they all suffer in reverse
and become swine
and go drown in ditches
by Divine Craze!