The razor blade in the cabinet gets thrown out,
it never gets the opportunity to learn deep.
I tell him to drive me home before I become too tired to care.
I save myself for someone who does.
Haley doesn't move away,
we finish high school the way we plan.
The dealer who sells death is gone the day he calls to ask for some,
when they find him,
it isn't too late.
She doesn't walk out of the party when she does,
the bullet misses her by a few minutes.
I am sweeter to my love when it exists,
I pull him around my waist as the music plays and
we drive home that night happy
I laugh at our fights and am the first to surrender always
I don't let stubborn win
I don't let it end in a single phone call
I try a little harder.
The cancer is discovered earlier or
It never comes at all.
When he takes without asking,
I take back what's mine
I don't let him leave me silent,
without fight,
I take the lit cigarette he borrows from me,
burn a gap into the center of his palm and say,
"This is what you asked for, isn't it?"
I bury my unused pepper spray in the backyard.
Nobody tells me,
"You should have been more careful."
After spilling my story,
I don't respond to the thank you for sharing
I ignore it and never have to hear his later excuse for disinterest.
I take the temporary out of his heart and give it back to him.
I stop communication the minute he says,
"I'm still with her."
I go back to the tattoo shop and cover up the words before they start to sync with memory.
When he calls me beautiful,
I call him on his *******,
I leave before he can form a response.
I don't invite him back on lonely nights.
I actually hear him say sorry.
When he asks to comeover, I say I'm busy.
I don't give him the chance to know how it feels to kiss me.
I don't answer when he wonders how I'm doing.
I don't wonder how he is.
I apologize for my mistakes with genuine sincerity.
I stop breaking already intact things.
I tie every loose end before leaving
I move away content.
I am happy.