Waging my wars
in my mind, body, and soul
Shouldn't be this hard.
Emptiness..
What is this?
I'm probably not as fine as I seem
Cried myself sick,
need a distraction
that I can't find
Sometimes to stay alive you gotta **** your mind
Why is it always stormy days
that keep me company
Funny, because I love the rain
Usually a semblance of pain,
gloomy days.
But it's calming to me..
But the hurt won't go away,
It shouldn't even be around
I shouldn't be hurt
over these things
I shouldn't want to stay in bed all day
I shouldn't feel like a burden to everyone
I shouldn't feel this ****** up
I shouldn't think the way I do,
I take for granted a lot of things
Someone tell me..
does it get better?
do I stop wanting to give up?
Been this way for a while now,
thought I was getting better
and really, I was...
but now
I think I'm the worst I've ever been
and I'm craving something
anything
to drown out these thoughts
preferably scalding
to throw away the burning knife that isn't real
it's a figment of my mind
Broken fragments
that were almost whole