I'm not miserable that you're not here anymore.
I am in despair that I am and always was the bad guy.
I ruined our chance to be friends.
I hurt you and scared you.
I came off as someone I'm not.
I lose my perception and my self esteem whenever I see you.
What now, I blind myself?
I am already blinded by your not being around anymore.

I want to know how you are.
I want to hear your honesty as it was always reserved for me.
I miss your responses.
Every message bubble made me feel tickled.
I remember you picked me up and spun me around I had never
experienced such a feeling.

Then they were shattered and hurt you said it wasn't there.
I thought it was.
You told me how you cared but I stupidly let myself go.
We didn't know how to act or what to say.
Now I've changed and grown.
I cannot beg for another chance, I cannot keep trying to talk to you anymore.
I can only grow some more so I don't ruin anything ever again.
It may or may not be over.
We were greatly overwhelmed by one another.
We are different.
We are disputable.

Like I said in tears  before you walked out on my command.
Only because I knew it would happen on behalf of my baggage.
I just don't want either you or me
to be
gone.
Still I believe I will do my part if you ask.
Will you give me another chance?