I am waiting for a love worth holding on to
Each tick of the clock reverberates throughout my body
I often try to convince myself that I can find love on my own if I look hard enough
But real love is the kind that you do not have to search for
I have learned that scrounging up what looks good enough
Will only teach you that you should not build a house out of scraps
Sometimes I try to color myself different shades to fit into someone else's art work, sometimes I forget about my own color
Because we all want to be what everyone wants
But we end up wanting everyone and not knowing our own name
So I have decided I am waiting
Patience falters every now and then
But I know someone will see constellations in my birthmarks soon enough so until then I promise to do my best in not painting over them
I will find myself in my abstinence, regain all of my strength that I gave away in beds that are not mine
I know that eventually  someone will notice that light on my skin even if it does not shine that bright to some
A light is still a light no matter how brilliant it may look
This will not be an easy journey for me
I tend to hold my heart out in my hand and anyone who reaches to grab it, takes it, I hardly ever put up a fight
I love too easily for someone who wants to wait but I do
I have sat by too many telephone, received no phone calls, resulting in too many damp pillows and tears stains on the sheets of paper that I write about those whom I love on
I am waiting for someone who will fill me with joy more than they put me in agony
I am waiting for someone who will kiss me and not taste past lovers on their tongue, someone who will not be able to kiss me without smiling
Someone who will love me when I am a still day
Someone who will love me when I am a hurricane
I know that uncertainties are abound in life
And I know that this waiting may never truly end
Though while I am here, loving myself in this isolation I will think of how I will love you, the man whom I know is out there somewhere
Perhaps he too, is waiting for me