I never thought I'd need anything that I couldn't keep tucked in the inside pocket of a worn out leather jacket
Till I knew fear the first time, licking my cheeks in the dark
Gasping for air in the front seat of a cherry red Americana funeral hearse, going 90 miles per hour to crash the gates of Heaven
With life and glory spreading out onto the pavement
And I was afraid, like I would be afraid for the rest of my life
Till I drowned my youth in the muddy waters of a river I only knew in passing,
Which flowed from a point I'd never see, to somewhere I'd never know
But I never found a bridge, and I never let it go
And I shook, like I would shake for the rest of my life
Till I saw the ghosts of stars reflected in the eyes of a young girl, who wanted nothing more than to make me clean, and good, and happy
Who kissed like karma, cherry red remorse stains that took hours to wash off my face and my neck
Black hair on my black sheets, like a portrait I might paint if I could steady my ******* hands
And I turned my back, like I would turn my back for the rest of my life
Now I taste sin each time I wake, rolling through the timid mist of my days,
With the ache coming in next, and the smoke not long after
And I apologize to the Midwest sun,
I'm afraid I haven't been a good friend these last few years
But the night speaks so sweet, and she makes promises neither of us will ever keep
Our first sin was a lie we told ourselves
And now we're too tired to correct
So we'll keep the course wherever it leads
For this,
All that I’ve done, all that I’ve failed to do
I will stumble through the best apology I can give
But you won’t believe it,
And neither will I