I love you
And I want to hurt you
and make you sit on your bed with your head in your hands,
pushing on your eyeballs
trying to hold the tears in.
I want to make you anxious
and make you check your phone every ten minutes
And I want you to feel a sinking
in your heart and stomach
each time you do.
I want to frustrate you
to the point where you can't sit down
and instead must pace back and forth or drive in circles
Because **** it there must be
some way out of this.
I want to build you up
and tear you down by your innocent and fragile heartstrings,
dragging you carelessly behind me
but holding on so tightly
Because I love you.