I have grown accustom of hiding my emotions, because they prove to be too potent for me to maintain, so I lock them away inside the subconscious parts of my brain, in an attempt to some how mitigate the pain, but it only seems to concentrate the hurt, resulting in a build up of an array of feelings, to the point where I fell as if I'm about to burst, and to make matters worse I have been conversing with death, who suggest that I be left six feet in the dirt, deceivingly making something so cruel sound as sweet as a flirt, tempting me to convert to his side, and It doesn't help that I have been running out of reasons on why to deny the offer, questioning my own existence, asking myself "Am I  truly my life's author?" Or Is there someone else writing the script, and if so do I have a say in any of it? My mind strays into these dark places far to often, people telling me to toughen up, but I just soften, I just wish this morbid thinking could be easily forgotten.