i walk down a hallway
surrounded by doorways
and silence
as my footsteps
bounce off of the bare
walls and vaulted ceilings

i pass each doorway
and the hinges swing
and i'm peering in
at a piece of myself,
a memory that has
taken the raw pink
bundle i started out as
and made me into
who i am as i scribble
down these words
on the clock

some doorways unleash
the smell of salt, the
breeze of a mountain top,
the feel of rain on the
hottest of days

others aren't as pleasant…
the bedroom door slamming,
reckless hands on the
steering wheel,
tears plummeting to
the page as i say goodbye
one last time
for the thousandth time

then i arrive at
the end of the hallway
and i'm surrounded by
doors with ancient
locks that have
rusted over,
the hinges corroded
and stuck in place
for they have sat
alone and unused
for so long

i want to reach
out and dust the
cobwebs off the
door handles, but
something stops me
and just as i turn
to walk away
i hear a creaking
noise behind me

the door at the end
of the hallway
slowly swings open
and my jaw hangs
low and heavy,
weighed down with
shock, horror,
and disappointment
at what lies
in front of me

i now realize
that i've been alone
longer than i ever
had suspected
and even though
we still shared
the bed with
the wrong size sheets,
you had already
left me

"she's not the woman
i'm meant to spend
my life with,"
is plastered all over
like wall paper
scrawled again and again
in your hand writing
and i spin around
faster faster faster
until everything's a blur
because that's how
i like things now,
quick and confusing

eventually it all goes
black and i'm nowhere,
but the words echo
again and again
in my heart-
it's all i'm left with
and now i finally
understand
why i had to run