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Apr 2011
"I love you."
It'd been a while since I'd heard that from you
And I'd stopped craving to hear those three words from you,
Growing used to you being detached and turning to ice.
And yet I still kept you around.
To fend off the decreasing care you had toward me,
I kept her around.
To fend off your ever fading concern,
I made her believe in all of my lies.

"Give me a kiss."
I couldn't help but smile at that
Relief flooding through my veins at the thought that maybe you still wanted me around
Even though you obviously did by even having me there.
But even though you obviously didn't by the following weekend's events.
But I still wanted you even if you weren't going to want me anymore.
It's how I'd felt for the preceding month.
(And it's how I'd feel for the proceeding six.)
     I don't know why I was so surprised.
Rather, the shock that everything I thought had finally come true.
You were not mine anymore
And now I'm doubting if you ever really were.
ER Graves-Swinney
Written by
ER Graves-Swinney
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