it's always the eyes that get people, isn't it?
and it's the way that he smiles and turns his head to let out a laugh
so loud, and so filled with happiness that you can't help but let him in
and no it's wrong
and no the voices are saying it's not okay
and no don't let someone else in
don't break another heart and don't let it break the already broken pieces of you
but you can't help it
and so you cling onto his voice when you have the seas to split you
and you grab as much of that blurred eye of his through the video that you can
and you take every ounce of negative thought and you shove it down the bathtub drain along with your tears
because you feel optimistic for the first time in a long time
and although the fear you have is unconquerable you try to conquer it anyway
because you can do it
and you know that he's making the risk too


you've both been through hell and you've learned how to breath fire
but when you meet someone who turns your fire into water, pulls the knife that's stabbing your thoughts out, you don't just wish they never showed up.