you read me like braille. connecting the dots and then crushing them down, as if they didn't exist, i'm just a selfish girl. i heard your favorite sonata colliding between your headaches and headphones, but i wanted you to listen to me instead. i could tell by the language your body created, careless, brittle even, but you'd never admit to such an inclusive map like the one you picked up on your last travel through the desert. and once you got back to Pennsylvania, you spoke of how sometimes the nights were frigid and how the sun bloomed always, like the day i reached the level of vocabulary words and the attraction i found between me and some boy. i didn't think he'd stick with my indecisive storm watches or the fact that i loved the way shooting stars meant nothing really. they were just strikes through the sky that caught nerves. so every once in a while when i catch you speaking in temperatures, i guess i don't have the right furnace to burn through it. maybe it's selfish, but i have my own thoughts to cool down before i tend to yours.