i have a pitbull named muffin
          a cat named cat
          a gold fish that i thought was a piranha
         and a bird that wouldn't shut up

muffin and cat, fight everyday
i'm scared of that fish, i heard they eat people
and that ******* bird, it won't shut up

muffin and cat has torn my house apart
the fish bowl stinks
and there's bird feed everywhere

what am i to do
i'm now half insane
should i get a wife
to drive me insane