a plethora of sleepless nights*

soft hand on my belly i hear this whisper

the thawing of thoughts the panic of rebellion

it is. 34 degrees outside but i can feel everything from frostbite to softflames. warm inside my belly soft hand on it. making circles with a sweaty palm.

i leave my window open and imagine retreat. the capacity of running to whichever corner of this town i wish. springs in steps filled with stormy ferocity. where my heart will no longer be so acquainted with my stomach.

//////STORM// i am free. fiercely loved. i am the wind knocking on your windows. shattering your dreams. dancing in your eyes. phantom touches up your spine.

i wished to be nothing but tender. my heart soft glitter mud in hands squeezing through cracks Pulling Pleading  Pushing up the stream to stay put stay put stay.     put.      

left intact the swirls spat into the wall with plastic tacks. a sickened love.