Say, heart, that was a shock

that was a shock to the system that got nervous

some never recover but we do, we can , we are -

Say, heart... that was unexpected and violent
air plane crashes and dead body smells
sandalwood roses and milk sweets

Say, Heart
that was a new kind of feeling
England in the countryside and hedgehogs squished to pavements
Swimming after fogged up bus rides
and Bob Marley in the white Golf.

Say, Heart that was pretty cool
watching the London Eye go up on telly
then seeing it outside
then a school with swapsies and teachers checking to see if you ate
and a sister waiting in the chair next to me

Say, Heart
11 schools later
aren't you glad we saw them all?

Say, Heart
how many times did we crack before we broke open?
and I whispered that we'd be ok as long as we kept moving
and now we know that clinging to moments is what makes the pain worse..

Say, Heart
I feel you beating now after so many times searching for a pulse and finding something else there instead.

the oozing of generational lies
and slaps that turned green
along with the screams and I feel that we are all screaming
we are all screaming
silently
into the blankets on frosty january morns or into our 10th cup of tea to drown out the cold

into our tiger teddybears or elephants stiched in pink,
perhaps it'll be our CD's that reminded us of home, when we're on a far off continent where pain lurks around us and the children are crying at the top of the stairs
and kidney failure is just round the corner but how could we know?

That glass shower doors were yet to be smashed and police cars were yet to have left and guitars were yet to have been bartered
your love for a 6 stringed instrument that is a sacred therapy

And Say,
Heart
we were told that staying silent was proper
and the sound of our voice too loud

children should be seen and not heard
emotions are weak and blood or lust is front page news


Say, Heart what do you make of that?
No wonder those eyes are twitching just slightly ,
and the nervous system never really calmed down,
the setting of the perfect storm
to rain mystic myriads of inner dimensional travel
because yes, ultimetly it's my greatest teacher

but
trauma doesn't just fade.

Trauma doesn't just fade.

Trauma doesn't just fade
until we let it, wadda say heart?


Say it Heart....
Say it Heart....
let it out, sweet, dear Heart..
Say it..... Heart.