i lift the blade like a glass of champagne
sweet on the tongue
heat bubbling up from some place that's
buried so deep that only the ashes
from the cigarettes i smoke and
the pitiful tears i choke back
can settle there.
here's to the new year
in a body that's a killer
and a mind that wanders
through field of dandelion and forget-me-nots
and forgets. What it's like to not have
that gnawing sense of urgency and worry
with every step i take down the inevitable path
that keeps spiraling out of my own control.
my heart is god knows where, i'd imagine its floating
in a sewer. decomposing. breaking down in to what
every unique human is exactly made out of.
ashes to ashes
and dust to dust
i'm so sorry i let you down in the worst way
please sleep peacefully.