this is my song in the desert stumbling in my pursuits when my mind, it is dry, but my heart it does beat dug deep inside my pretended screams
i yell to hear myself feel buried beneath a silent mind clawing my walls and playing my keys someday my hip bones will turn into wings
flying across this desert of skin i cling to the hints of hope tossed within and wait for the stars to fall closer and near as i wait to whisper along my desert song
my fingers bleed so desperately hungry to cling to that tree made of pain but i am afraid of my weight so to stay sane i lean into silence and kiss my own fingers clean
i walk along the curve in my spine only once i heard the muffled sounds come clear and clean: i am not free and this is my song in the desert
i smile my denials, what a sweet smile i donβt want to be the judge in all of his trials please stop these thoughts from running too deep add one more thorn to your crown to bleed
when i cannot breathe, still this is my song in the desert when everything in me is dry please let me hum and escape this quiet brain until the sun falls out of the sky
i tried to find my rooftops to find my wings in bloom i tried to leap into your arms but afraid to tear your scars, i fled
i slept inside my skin instead tracing shapes with my restless legs but oh please send help, i am not fine i harbor the assassin inside my mind
i grasp for an angel and touch a dream lost in a city with only me i threw my maps and watched them drift my knuckles are mountains and my veins fake streams.
in the very dark back corner of my brain up a serpent arises to kiss my lies in slow depart this alone i cannot slay
and this is my song in the desert my flesh i am desperate to bleed but my weapons are dull, rusted and old and my battle cry fades into silence
on the day that i cried she said she saw an illness in my eyes your deathly crown sits along my waterline cupping my iris, reminding me of their crimes
this is my desert song sung when my heart is so heavy that it crushes my lungs and with its deflate finally i see your name
but rip my tightly woven threads and gently untangle my knotted hair the wind has blown across the dust of my thoughts please sweep me up and wash me whole
perhaps whats been dried will taste sweeter and longer brighter vibrations with growing explosions the victory sweeter and my strength grown softer maybe when your water runs
again i will grow green and i will be clean under your tree thorns will turn back to dark lashes again
this is my song in the desert as i search for streams inside my soul drain me of the dust inside and cup a single drop into my side
this is my secret song, please teach me to be whole loud and clear with silenced fear my unsung song will scream through
and in you i will hear my soul again.
i have edited and molded this in my hands longer than most anything else. yet it is too long and rambles and has no rhythm and pleads to be cut down. i will. but excuses and examinations of my poorly written words, this poem is more true than anything i've written in a while.