i use to spend my days curled up in bed wondering why you didn't love me like you said you did a month ago. on the days i was able to ignore the crippling pain, i got up and sat in my shower gasping for air as i bathed in my own tears. i thought i had lost you, but the only thing i had lost was myself. i'd go days without eating and still ending up purging upon my own body, punishing myself for never being enough for you; for anyone. i tried to find myself within other people and it wasn't until now that i realized i was steady trying to put together the wrong set of broken pieces.