I sink to the bottom, I float back to the surface.
I can't stay in one spot. It makes me so nervous.

I don't care if I stay afloat. I don't even care if I drown.
I'm just tired of feeling anchored. Bobbing up and down.

Just one person. That's all it would really even take.
One kind soul to rescue me. An honest heart. One not fake.

And I wish this angel would find me. Unbind me from this anchor.
I wait for hope to embrace me. Love, to release me from this hurt.

A friend would make this simpler. To be wanted, I'd feel fine.
Anything to not walk alone. A heartbeat and footstep other than mine.

And I know I'm not alone. I haven't been at all.
I've always had One walk with me. To catch me as I fall.

But when will I find someone here? Someone TANGIBLE, as well as true.
A friend that I can touch. A soul I can love. An honest heart. But who?

I'm done with the whining. I'm beyond done with tears.
I'm done with feeling sorry for myself year after freaking year.

What have I even got to be upset over? What's left that's bad?
Everywhere I go, I'm happy. I'm not even the faintest bit sad.

Honestly, yeah I wish it was different. Wish things hadn't ******.
But really? Everyone's better off. We've ended this string of bad luck.

Yeah, I'll always miss it. Those stupid times that made us laugh.
But I've got so much waiting ahead. No good being stuck in the past.

Truthfully, a part of me will always wonder "What if I'd just stayed?"
And I already know the answer. I'd have always been betrayed.

So here I am, reminiscing with love, hope, and grace.
Not whining about the past, tears staining my face.

Honestly, I know I'll never forget. Time can't destroy the memories, all.
Honestly, I won't remember. Time heals all bones broken from the fall.

The flood gates break free and in anger I nearly drown.
Depression sets in as the waves finally begin to die down.

Hopelessness rises up. Confusion, pain, loss.
Feelings grow worse and I hope that I'm wrong.

I'd rather not say what I think. None of it really matters.
I don't need you; you don't need me. It drags me down faster.

You're no good for me and I just can't save you.
So I'm just stepping out. God will show me what to do.

Of course! I still have to pray for you. If not, it'd be a sin.
I may be done with you and this. But my God still lies within.

Maybe you'll be saved. And who knows? Then you'd be good for me.
But I can't lead you there. I'm just not good enough to set you free.

I just can't stop the flood. So I guess I'll be forever wading.
And forever I'll be watching. Praying.. Hoping... Waiting....

I look around, and I see no one else.
It's always just me, surrounded by myself.

Some would call this hell: living in such seclusion.
But I am surrounded by simplicity; not by confusion.

I'm not really alone. Presence of grace lies in every nook.
The love of my God is visible in every place that I look.

I may be all by myself. "Trapped in this place"
But with my faith around my neck, I feel safe.

It reminds me of who I am. Reminds me my suffering's done.
Reminds me of the kid I used to be. And the man yet to come.

The homes I was raised in shine in every detail.
And I know He is with me. With Him, I won't fail.

So am I really alone when no one else is around?
Because I can hear His voice when there are no other sounds.

I am the moved; the unmovable rock.
Born out of darkness with a Brightest Heart.

But my eyes have been opened, and I am yours.
I have been saved! I am your unmovable force.

I surrender my life. It was a life that shouldn't be mine.
And I will surrender to you. For my savior, I will die.

I will spread your love. My last breaths shall be of Your Word.
I will no longer be slave to the enemy. Tonight, I wage war.

War on myself, war against this world of which I am not a part.
I am moved. Tonight, I become your unmovable rock.

My emptiness has died. I will forever be a soldier of My God.
I will take up arms against the darkness. We will bring a new dawn.

Brothers and sisters, it is time to answer His Call; our time is now.
He who leads us cannot be beaten. With Him, we cannot fall down.

I am not ten feet tall and bullet proof..
Despite my every attempt, I don't know what to do.

I am weak, I get lost, I fall down, and I feel pain..
And every single day, I get back up again.

I hide behind music, I pretend that I don't care..
But no matter how far I run, You are still there.

You give me the strength that I can't find.
You fill me with Your love when I can't handle life.

I am not ten feet tall and bullet proof. Though someday, I will be.
When I become as strong as a rock, and know You're with me.

When I feel Your fire which burns as hot as a million suns.
And when I can finally show the same love as Your Son.

I will be ten feet tall and I will be bullet proof.
I will be a testament to Your love. I will know You.

Sometimes.. I wish I was still dark. Wish I hadn't been saved.
And sometimes... I wish I could hold on to all of this pain and rage.

But I'm not myself when I follow that darkened path.
I can't deny who I am. Despite my attempts, it never lasts.

I always felt this day would come. The day I wanted it back..
The day I missed the darkness. When I could finally accept the past.

Sometimes I wish I could find myself. Others, I wish I hadn't begun.
Sometimes I feel both... And all that makes me want to do is run.

I wish I was better at writing music. It makes me feel so alive.
But I can't find out who I am. And I really don't know why..

I'm not really feeling any pain.. God took that away from me.
And though it doesn't hurt, I still feel like I'm not yet free.

Sometimes.. I wish I could talk to you. Just **** it up and try.
And sometimes... I wish I was still dark, so that I wouldn't hate to lie.