I guess someone fixed this door
It used to creak a lot more
The interior is wearing a coat of dust
The metal ceiling fans are starting to rust
Times decaying powers are working full force
They throw me way off course
No longer submerged deep in the past
Reality hits me hard and fast
This was, at one point, my living room
Memories,like weeds, start to bloom
Dad(If he was home) was always drinking
My little sister never had an inkling
Mom was always working
But the bills were always lurking
Soon there was a lot less food
And it didn't help the mood
When dad just went off like a bomb
And just went after mom
I remember vividly the day
That child services took us away
Dad wasn't home and Mom was in tears
And in her eyes I saw her worst fears
I stand in that room till i can't anymore
Then for one final time I head for the door

The stars glowed like dying embers in the ash
As the skyline and the stars clashed
I looked with squinting eyes
Trying to decipher the night skies
Like an old sailor lost at sea
I try to get free
From the sidewalk the buildings look impossibly tall
It made me feel impossibly small
The streets twist and turn
Almost randomly, as if they didn't want me to return
Cell phone long dead
I try and keep a level head
I continue into the dead of night
Guided only by the hollow glow of street lights
I looked for landmarks by which to navigate
To perhaps subvert my fate
Of being lost forever

You know every single word to every single song
And you always sing along
Each song is tied to a different memory
Everyone fits a moment just perfectly
You've listened to B-side and EP
And searched as far as the eye can see
For those rare releases only on cassette tape
And you always manage to scrape
Just enough money for when they're in town
And they've never let you down
Because when you've hit a dead-end
You know you can always depend
On them to turn you around
To help you find solid ground
To you its not just a song, an album or a band
Its a way to understand

Trains delayed
Nerves frayed
The rain isn't slowing
And the winds keep blowing
I'm stuck on this platform
Trying desperately to keep warm
In my pocket is that photograph
Of me and you having a good laugh
I glance at it every once in a while
Just to make me smile
By now its almost ten
But I couldn't tell you when
I was going to pull into your station
Because that is information
That is being withheld by the fates
And they can't be trifled with petty dates
And the long term plans
That slip right out of our hands
And unravels quicker than string
Because we don't know what the future will bring
But the fates will not beat me down
And I will make it out of this town
I will come home to your smiling face
And hold in a warm embrace

We were walking down the street
Following the winding trail of concrete
Wandering in the summer rain
Experiencing the majestic and the mundane
Our clothes soaked clean through
And I looked over at you
And you had ear buds in your hand
And you asked if I had anything planned
I said no
You said we should go
We found a park and sat underneath a tree
And you looked over at me
We had an ear bud in each ear
We turned it up so we could hear
We sang loudly and proudly
Until it was no longer cloudy

Got home from the hospital late last night
Still can't seem to find my appetite
I can't seem to sit still
There's a hole that I don't know how to fill
I've listened to my ipod non stop
Headphones so loud I feel my ears are gonna pop
The dice will fall as they may
But at the end of the day
I know that they were always loaded
I feel like my life has always been encoded
Protected by a cipher I could never completely break
I never truly understood what was at stake
Until that day last week
When you and I were hanging by the creek
We were laughing and tossing rocks
Just relaxing having good long talks
When my vision started to go hazy
and I know this is crazy
But i knew then that I was dying
And you started crying
I felt a sharp tightening in my chest
I lost consciousness as the attack progressed
I woke up in my hospital bed
The doctors told me that I should be dead
They used phrases like "suffered major cardiac event"
I asked what that meant
I told me that I had a heart attack
I was immediately taken aback
I was only seventeen
This was almost something that was unseen
Arrhythmia was the name of the disease
They said it was easy to manage with medicine and their expertise
But now I can no longer rest
Knowing that I have ticking time bomb in my chest