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Kept telling them,
he will make a nuisance out of you.

But these women won't listen,
he will present you a sham stability, a sham relationship.

But these women won't open their eyes.
It breaks my heart that the very woman who gets trafficked;
Does not realize that she is getting used and exploited.

I need not be their saviour, not save them from predators.
Moral police I have been called.
Aghast, I don't know how to rescue them from notorious womanizers.

I have been told time and again by women - they don't need my saving. I hope they never do.

The horrors I have seen, I don't trust an idea, a thing, a being called - man or mankind.
Same old. Keeping me as the clandestine.
I was not enough of an arm candy.
What is different with this one?

This has happened to me before as well.
I know how to handle the denial of my existence.
I know how to handle belittling and rejection.

I am an expert at managing this.
I will as always be fine.

But never be anyone's arm candy and an empty vial.
I have the strongest of character and I know by default repulse the immoral - that has been my only 'fault'.

I have believed in me, what if a shallow man has not!
I am the depth he cannot afford with his lack of conscience.
I will as always be fine.

Good girls finish last. Indeed.
If only I had been more ostentatious;
I would have him.

If only I had more power;
I would have him.

If only I had more fame;
I would have him.

Having a character falls short;
When all he knows is to chase glitter.
He chases more noise making empty vessels and - that is his agency.

I fade into oblivion, as maturity always does, blending into the background and ceases to exist.
A man spending his time building up other women and their lives?
Loyal, you think he can be loyal?
He cannot be your man, he can just be a man.

A woman spending her time building up other men and their lives? Loyal, you think she can be loyal?
She cannot be your woman, she can just be a woman.

~ observer
I am mad at myself, I am mad at the loyalty, understanding and patience I gave to a man.

To a man who gloated about his affairs and whose affairs mocked me right back;

Why not? Only an alien can get me, not a man drunk on power, fame and external validation.

All my life I have been waiting for an alien, whose value system is not as gimmicky as that of a human.

I have observed enough of what could have been, would have been, should have been.

From a man who gloated about his affairs, I can expect nothing. I cannot be his next prey, not his next affair.  

Alien, do you exist, where are you; which galaxy - I have failed to match the mockery - that is humankind.
Sometimes the world gets too modern for my liking.
Too twisted and toxic.

Simplicity and traditions burning on a pyre.
Too poly-cataclysmic.

It's baffling how just two people together is too alien a concept to humanity.
Are we living in the world of dodecahedrons or another polygonal circus?

As a solo traveller of life, all I have observed is devastation and I shudder at the ruse and facade these humans put on; like a charade.

I have two people in me. I am my own man and my own woman.
Saves a lot of travesties and tragedies.
Never liked the spotlight.
Horrifies me.
I feel like a ladybird - scuttling into my den.

I am a wool of nerves.

So much wrong happening in the world, why am I even complaining.
Thankless woman you are. Ungrateful for the life you have.
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