Never partied in life. Never socialized.
Awkward woman gets nobody.

Nervous laughs and giddy hands quivering
Stage fright exploding

Why am I even in this world
I am just full of fear.

A lot of fear.
I would rather live in a cupboard than expect humans to leave me alone.

Cupboard and I will box myself in from cacophony and lies.
I was always alone and that was always wise.

Fear of being alone my entire life is gripping me, given that loyalty is so rare.

I was never a player, why me, why cannot I have a sincere person. Why? I never wrecked. I never had anybody to cheat on.

I don't know what karma is this? When I have never wronged anyone, why me dodging involved humans.

When should I have exactly lured a man? When I was engrossed in my studies? And now at this age all are taken.

I don't know but solitary life was not what I had imagined, but my ethics won't let me wreck nor play with anybody.
Am I that old lady with kittens at 60 who dies while knitting a sweater? Yes.
Or am I a turtle in a shell? Turtle in a shell, tumbled on the road and died.

Why do I keep tumbling, bumbling, rumbling, grumbling, fumbling?

One loyal person who will commit to me.
This is what I ask of thee, just seems like some fantasy.
Something as basic as loyalty. The patience so amiss.

Players galore, lies extempore.
I am hopeless in life, completely.
I believe a non-toxic man does not even exist.

This is hell.

I always chased my ambitions;

A quiet life in a hamlet.

Just perfect, at one with nature.

A life - just divine.

I was always out of the matrix.

Waiting for the clock to turn 60. It is nearly 30.

Life goes by, pleasantly, minute by minute; year by year.

Where is home, the planet to which I belong?

The purpose of my birth - to serve the creator of the universe. I am her servant. I bow.

I was always wise to know
That life is best spent solo.

I am Groot.

Ah, but his woman expects him to be loyal.
A woman and the demise of her expectations.
The story of every woman I have seen.

Does it shudder your soul to see how women are used and abused?

The solitary life was and is perfect indeed. That is what I chose for me. Imagine if I had to face the horrors she faces everyday.

To each struggling woman, I don't wish to become like you.

When I will be 60 atleast I will not be in a mental asylum like her, thanks to her 'man'!

She will cry her way with pots and pans correcting a characterless fellow.

I will die happy. I love myself enough to not become a crazy lady.

I am indeed the solitary reaper of my life and my soul.

Three Decades to A Happy Life;
Three Decades to A Sane Life!
And to Three Decades More to Go - The Race to the Grave with Grace - with a smile on my face.

Creator of the nebula of gases, I will meet you there -in Heaven. Earth is all cacophony and hell. Three more decades to cover parsecs.

I have always kept safe distance from men. I would rather keep the books closer to myself.
Single and free; free from mankind - oh the tragedy!
I am my own melody, what do these dysfunctional couples even find in each other?!

I love me. So I don't need a man to drive me loopy.
I am a teddy bear in a bloopie or like a beetle in the world, scuttling around amazed by my best friend for life - nature.

Next life, I want to be upgraded as an ant though. Wish list made. Three Decades Prior.
Not a Human in next life. No. Fingers crossed.

Till then I pray, for all women. I see them go through so much. I pray for them to have a resilient spine with all the betrayals their men provide.
For every woman, I put out this prayer out in the ethers - I wish her sanity, loyalty and happy life.

How could a woman betray a woman? That is what a man does to his woman. Sister, I will lend you more weapons to instil sense in him. Don't cry your way with pots and pans.

Burn the coal and make him dance - and you set the tune, my woman!

Everywhere I go, I need not be on my own;
But that is what I always chose.

Everywhere I went, I built my cave
But that is how I evaded the maze.

I don't get humans, I was not socialized enough.
If only I knew how to be shallow, I could have been normal.

I am in love with my absurdities.
I might as well be a cave animal, far removed from sociological obligations.

The most precious is time.
That you donate to consolidating the voice of the hurt, the bruised and the abused.  

The most valuable is wisdom.
That you gather from books and life.

The most comfort is in being alone.
That which nature teaches you.