You're the one that
I always thought I knew.
It took me almost 6
careful months,
of late nights,
empty beer cans,
and used up pipes.
But it wasn't just me getting
to know you,
you got to know me
in the darkest corners
of the morning.
And before my own eyes,
you almost had me figured out,
although I was no where close.
I'm sure that you know
I still care and miss you.
But there's not even
a breeze in the wind
that tells me you feel the same.

My biggest fear is that
one day,
something will happen,
and then my fingers will go
to work and the next time
I look in the mirror
it will all be gone.

And I'll be left
standing in a
pile of my own
regrets.

I think it's sort of weird
how I've created this
character of him in my
mind.
Where he is everything I
want him to be,
and the truth.
I was thinking that maybe
I'm becoming this weird,
stalker type person,
but now I realize that he
is that place in my mind
that I can go
when I need to find happiness
or solitude.

It's nice to go there.

I saw him in my dreams
again.
It happens all the time.
But in this one,
he was standing close behind me
and I turned around to
face him,
unaware of how close we were.
I can remember the thought
that went through my head
as I kissed him.
Even though it's wrong
you'll never get another chance.
He kissed me back but then
turned away.
I think he said something
like, I'm over you.

But I said,
I miss you
anyway.

I don't know
who I am.