Hello mum,
Can you hear me?
Time cannot heal the wounds created by your death,
Every time I feel familiar with this ache inside of me, isolation claws at my chest and square one greets me again,
The nightmares constantly visit me, in them I see you suffer, then wake to cry tears I wish you could wipe away,
You were wrong, I cannot cope, I am not okay...

give me lemon to ****
yellow zest

wake me up
cool me down with - blue sky

the Sea calm
mirror mind

green pasture
crisp apple

honey dripping
drowned sugared.

It kills me;
A random thought,
Of madness,
Of sadness,
Of guilt.
Nothing more than a coward,
Afraid of facing demons;
Became one.
Indifferent towards himself,
Sympathetic towards others.

It kills me;
What hope I say,
Is hope I cannot hold on to.
I drag you down, unknowingly;
I tear you apart.
Just like what I do to them.
I'm sorry.

It kills me;
That we see each other without saying a word,
A broken record in repeat.
Getting close but I guess never close enough.
A movie nearing ******,
Yet never there.

It kills me;
How I can't say a word,
When it's all about to explode.

I'm sorry;
I doubt you would even feel the same;
If I told you,
Would you still see me the same?
It kills me.