Tonight I cried.
I wasn't at first,
But the idea
Of it all taking a wild spin,
And hitting a wall,
Stopping,
Hurt.
I wasn't crying,
Not until I realized
That maybe I just will
Always
Be an angry fuck up,
And never stop how I am,
No matter how hard
I try.
I thought that tonight,
I wouldn't get mad,
I would have a civil conversation,
But I still did,
Even after editing and editing
My words,
I still did.
I didn't realize
Just how much
I had wrong with me.
I thought I had myself
Sorted.
Not entirely,
But at least into
A recognizable shape.
Figured out.
But tonight,
I realized that there
Are parts of me
So fractured
That they look like fine dust,
And it doesn't hurt
Until you fall into it.
Tonight, I looked into
A mirror
That showed me
The truth.