It's so hard not to equate my worth with my beauty
I wish I could rip off my skin and my bones and muscles so that the only thing left was my brain
My thoughts
My love
My spirit
I hope we end up like that somehow in the end...balls of energy that emulate our spirit
The way we saw the world
The way we tried
I feel like I'm wasting time
Being sad over things I know aren't tangible and connected to my worth
It's so hard to separate my brain from what I was brought up to believe
I've learned that if my stomach is flat enough and skin is clear enough that everyone will like me
(They will. It's true.) Everyone falls in love with a beautiful person a little bit
As if they did something to deserve or create their physical appearance
The only thing that happened to create them is animalistic
We are all animals in the end
Reduced to dust, funneled through plants, eaten by animals, who are eaten by something bigger
A vicious cycle of death and rebirth
There is nothing left for us. Our minds have created a world soft enough to tread through; protected by gods and love and kindness
If you're really a nice person, you'll be rewarded
There is no reward. There is no secret. We are all here to exist and make the most of it
I'm not making the most of it. I'm sitting and dealing with oth(my)ers expectations
I'm going through stress to make my life harder
For what?
Acceptance? To get along with other animals?
We all start, act, and end the same; as animals.