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The Altar of Unexpected Items

I. Rite of Entry

The self‑checkout greets me

with the solemn glow

of a minor shrine.

A touchscreen altar

awaiting my offerings —

barcodes,

intentions,

the performance

of competence.

 

I approach

with the calm precision

of someone determined

to appear technologically fluent.

 

II. First Accusation

The scanner beeps –

a thin, accusatory trumpet

announcing my presence

to the congregation of machines.

 

Then the voice descends,

sharp as a reprimand

from an unseen priest:

 

“Unexpected item

in the bagging area.”

 

Not a warning.

A judgment.

A public note

on the fragility

of my character.

 

III. The Weight of the Lime

I place a single lime

on the sacred scale.

The machine hesitates,

unable to believe

in something so light,

so green,

so unprofitable.

 

It demands proof

of its existence.

I, momentarily doubting

my own reality,

lift the lime again

as if to reassure us both

that matter still matters.

 

IV. Waiting for the High Priest

The screen turns red,

a digital excommunication.

I stand exposed,

a supplicant

awaiting absolution.

 

From the distance

approaches the High Priest

of Override:

a bored teenager

with a lanyard

and the power

to restore my innocence

with a single tap.

 

He does not look at me.

He does not need to.

He knows my type.

 

V. The Performance of Honesty

I resume the ritual

with exaggerated clarity,

lifting each item

like a relic,

ensuring the cameras above

witness my devotion

to honesty.

 

My hands move

with ceremonial slowness –

a choreography

designed to prove

that I am not

a thief,

nor an idiot,

but a citizen

worthy of smooth transaction.

 

VI. Absolution

When the final beep sounds,

the machine softens,

granting me passage

with a printed blessing:

 

“Thank you

for shopping with us.”

 

I leave the altar

unchanged,

yet faintly polished –

a person who has survived

another small trial

of the modern self.

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Written by
VerseBuster
48 / M / Poland
Published
Apr 19
Lines·Words
91·308
Notes

A small liturgy of modern life, where the self‑checkout becomes a skeptical priest, the bagging area a fragile altar, and the shopper a worshipper performing the rituals of competence and honesty before a machine that trusts no one.

Tags
#poetry#satire#observationalpoetry#modernlife#humor#everydayrituals#urbanpoetry#personifiedobjects#lightverse#thepolishedself
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