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To The Boy With the Birthmark On His Right Lower Calf
( 9/18/09 - Forever Avenue )
You are a boy of a million different personalities one minute you love me more than anything the next you choose burned ashes over my last lit cigarette, you are the ocean beneath my feet you guide me to safer waters and make me believe in soulmates, i think that's what we were from the start, what we are, what we will always be. I will never love another boy like i do you. Five years has been but a pleasure, i could never truly walk away from you, you know that but i do take breaks from allowing you to make me cry because i don't want how much I love you to kill me I've heard it can happen so i guess in all respects this poem may not apply to you completely because you'll always be light in my life
This is my goodbye
To the Boy With the Cold Heart & the Four Glass Eyes
( 6/20/13 - 9/3/13 )
You are not made out of gold
You are rotten piles dirt
You were never one for intimate talks
In just 4 brutal encounters and 3 months of sweet nothing's you surely replaced you're sensitive skin for the persona of true devil in training
you sure were quick to remove cloth from skin
I should have figured it when I wanted to just lay and waste away or when I complained of being to tired to continue you'd say "you're being boring" as if the arousal was more exciting than being in nothingness together but maybe that's because you only loved my body however after you my body now disgusts me to look at, although I must say the scars are quite appealing , they haven't gone away.
To The Boy Who Made Me Feel Alive Again
( 12/6/13 - 12/27/13 )
You were true magic
A good listener from the start and quite polite when it came to the feel of velvet on velvet
You looked at me as I looked and the sky wondering how I even ended up here without being pronounced dead on arrival. That night in the dark with you was the night I released the last boy, the one just before you, from my ribcage for good and allowed you inside the darkest parts of me, thinking you would fix them or at least hoping you would, that made me feel somewhat okay, however when we reached my side of the street and our lips first collided I did not know it would be the first--and last time we would ever meet. Sometimes I thank God for meeting you even if you did leave like the rest
You made me feel alive for a good few weeks until you proved my theory of lovers wrong and calmly walked away, I like to think you'd come back if given the chance but maybe you're better off
I guess I'll never know
So to the both of you I have but one thing to say-- this is my goodbye
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