this blade im holding
is my only friend
never left me
helps me to feel better
i miss you
i miss the way you helped me
when everyone else left
ive lost everything
i will find you again

stars in the sky
moon on the water
you're on the grass
alone
cry til you cant feel
scream til your throat's raw
no one around to hear the pain
go to the edge of the water
jump in the water
swim to the bottom
sit
let the water fill your lungs
life is a game
that you will never win
dont go up
let it all be over

Do you even care?
Everytime i came to you
Pushing me away
Right when i needed you most
Easily hurt by you
Stop torturing me
Stop using me
Im done getting hurt
Optimism is no longer real
Never trusting you again

my last made me feel like i was nothing
feel like i would never be good enough
but when i saw you
all those thoughts went away
before you i was broken
tell me you feel the same about me
promise you're the only one for me
ill give you all my love

im an angel whose wings have been plucked
an angel who lost her halo
i grew into the darkness called depression
because of this darkness
i hated myself
still do
i wish i could die
i wish i could be loved
i wish i was free
the truth is
it will never happen

i want to look like her
gorgeous
wanted
loved
skinny
she looks so happy
with friends by her side
to stand up for her
to stop bad things from happening to her
why cant i have that?..

you can take away my self love
but you can't take away my worth.
I am worth more then the nights
I spent hearing your words
as I cried on the bathroom floor.
Your name is poison to my mouth,
but I still drink it.
But I will throw it up,
till the only word I know is my name.
I am more then you made me out to be.
You can't take away me from myself.

you manipulated me
you hurt me
you broke me
but i still cared about you
even when you forced me into
a relationship with you
even when you relied on me
to talk you out of suicide
i still cared about you
you killed yourself
and blamed it on me
i understand why its my fault
i wasnt there for that few hours
you thought i left you for good
but in the end
you are gone
and i miss you
i miss the pain
i miss the chaos
sometimes i wish you were still alive
other times im glad youre out of my life
because overall
you broke me

get a blade
tear your skin
watch the blood
dripping down
cut some more
over and over
same cycle
all day, everyday
itll never stop

torn to pieces
thrown on the floor
stomped on
used
maniulated
lied to
when will you stop
doing this to me
its killing me inside

dont be afraid
ill protect you
ill love you til the end
i will never hurt you
i will always be there for you
i promised myself i would help others
because i never got it

how could you use me like that
treat me like a piece of trash
like im nothing
you never cared about me did you
when you said you loved me
and that i dont have to worry bout you leaving
those were the lies our relationship was built on
did you ever care about me
was i just an object to you
promise me youll let her down slowly this time

the lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit

having anxiety and depression is like being scared and tired at the same time. it's the fear of failure, but no urge to be productive. it's wanting friends, but hate socializing. it's wanting to be alone, but not wanting to be lonely. it's feeling everything at once then feeling paralyzingly numb

i only miss you when im breathing

my last made me feel like i would never try again
but when i saw you i felt something i never felt
come closer give you all my love
if you treat me right
baby ill give you everything
my last made me feel like i would never try again
but when i saw you i felt something i never felt
come closer give you all my love
if you treat me right
baby ill give you everything
come to me
i need to hear you need me like i need you
fall for me
i wanna know you feel how i feel for you now
before you baby i was numb
tryna pay but pouring up?
speaking fast but on a run
never wanna get caught up
now you're the one that im calling
swear to god i'll never forget
don't think i'm just talkin
im thinkin like a wallin?
????????
i need it you need it you need it you the most
now im hurtin im hurtin you and ghost?
promise im done with the last one i thought i loved
because she ain't you
my last made me feel like i would never try again
but when i saw you i felt something i never felt
come closer give you all my love
if you treat me right
baby ill give you everything
my last made me feel like i would never try again
but when i saw you i felt something i never felt
come closer give you all my love
if you treat me right
baby ill give you everything
come to me
i need to hear you need me like i need you
fall for me
i wanna know you feel how i feel for you now

caring about what others think,
seeking innappropriate attention,
slitting your wrists open,
feeling like you have no one,
thinking you're not good enough,
acting like you're okay when you clearly aren't
because you are worthy

i cant seem to forget
how you looked at me
it made me feel
light and floaty
why did you hurt me
did you have to lead me on
then toss me to the side
like a piece of trash

why cant i look like the other girls
the girls that are wanted and happy
i want to be pretty
i want love
love like what you see in movies
hold my hand
pull me close
wipe away my tears
hug me from behind
i want to live that kind of life
where i dont need alcohol to be happy
where i dont have to tear open my arms to get rid of pain
where i dont need *** to fit in
where i dont need drugs to be accepted
but that wont happen
at least for me
life will always be cruel nd unfair
thats the life i live

people just dont care bout me anymore. but its fine. i dont care bout me either

i will never get over you

i know that you are using me
but i dont say anything
because i dont want you
to use somebody else

would you love me if i were skinnier?
would you love me if i were prettier?
would you love me if i were funnier?
would you love me if i was happy?
would you love me if i gave you everything??
because i can do anything you want me to
but what will never change is my love for you
i look at you and feel pain but love
its beautiful pain i guess
if you will love me like i love you
then i will be the happiest person in the universe