jenna elizabeth

jenna elizabeth Jan 2017

they say not to worry
they say not to stress
how can i not?
it's my future
it's my path
yet, i know
i have to give
the control over
to one who knows
my path and future
stop taking
start giving
stop worrying
start trusting
stop stressing
start relaxing
maybe then
the pieces
will fall
in place

jenna elizabeth Jan 2017

snow

white blankets the black
make beautiful the ugly

jenna elizabeth Jan 2017

fighting

there are some days when i want nothing more than to end everything
those are the days when i should fight more than ever before

currently listening to against the current: blood like gasoline

jenna elizabeth Dec 2016

nerves

i am nothing but a bundle of nerves
coming apart at every end
shaking and nervous
about to fray and fly away

jenna elizabeth Nov 2016

essence before existence

let's start with a henna tattoo
work my way to a real one
let's get a cartilage piercing
or maybe get two for fun
read all Shakespeare's plays
and his sonnets before the year ends
write a novel sometime soon
watch every harry potter with friends
see something that's Broadway
read 150 books in a year
have an author sign
a book that's been so very dear
Spend the entire day in bed
or sleep in the family car
in the playhouse out back
in a hammock somewhere bizarre
do something with a love
write a poem for him
slow dance in the rain
and dance away the dim
watch a sunset together
the light slowly appearing
a kiss in the rain
stargaze with day nearing
let's go visit mexico
or Germany, Ireland
let's fly in first class
or helicopter to be grand
see the hollywood sign
or the northern lights
or England or the gum wall
ride in a limo to see the sights
paintball or zip-line
perform a play on stage
try surfing in blue water
or mattress surf, not acting my age
learn to actually skateboard
see a favorite band live
eat German chocolate
run a kilometer or five
get my master's degree
have a chance to paddleboard
finally sing in public
get a guitar to play a chord
or why not have a paint fight
play twister with a mess
walk through a drive through
skinny dip and not fess
put mentos in coke
swim with my clothing on
write in wet concrete
streak across the lawn
tp someone's car
buy a coffee to be kind
smash pie in someone's face
carve initials to remind
so there's my bucket list
spelled out for all to see
the only question is
who would want to join me?

my bucket list, in poem form

jenna elizabeth Nov 2016

I remember

I remember how you hated buying period supplies with me and how you stayed one aisle away from me the entire time. I remember cuddling in the back of your car, which always led to us kissing, followed by long talks. I remember talking about nothing in particular, but always talking. I remember the early morning phone calls and how groggy you were. I remember late night phone conversations and how we’d almost be falling asleep when we hung up. I remember you calling me cute every day, even if I had just hiccuped. I remember me falling asleep next to you countless times. I remember how our hands were always touching. I remember almost everything you ever told me. I remember you. I remember you and I hate how much I remember because it just hurts. It hurts because all I have are these memories and I don’t have you. I don’t have you because I made a choice. I’ll stand by the choice I made, but. But when it’s close to 3am and I’m sobbing into my pillow, telling myself that I’ll be okay, that’s when I remember.

jenna elizabeth Oct 2016

two decades

look at you, little one.
born in canada, raised in america, transplanted to papua new guinea
college student and part time yogurt store employee
you say your soul is as black as can be, but it's golden and glittering
all that you've lived through
the hurt, the ache, the laughter, the love
all those make up you
little jenna elizabeth 'little bit'
you've done so much
and you have so much more to do
especially when it comes to loving and giving
give all you can, expect nothing back
love god. love others. love yourself
two decades on this earth
how many more to come?
just remember to stop
and smell the roses
as you make your way
through life

in honor of my twentieth birthday