a whisper to the side
a tingle up my spine
a teleprompter in my head
that i forgot to mind

to have a thought like you
      replacing
      or reshaping
my brain forming in my hands
      just clay
and your voice is heard
      but only ever following mine
what I would give to hear without uttering a sound
      chitter
      or chatter
words flowing from my lips
      stealing my breath
a pursuit I never win

You loved me like the sun
always expecting to be burned
hiding away in the shade of your mind
but desperately needing my warmth
just the same

You loved me like the moon
dancing at my fullest
forgetting me at my dimmest
expecting my tides to take you
farther than they could

You loved me like the stars
a light that you could see
but never understand
the mysteries of my galaxy
questions you'd never thought to ask

You loved me through a telescope
marveling from afar
the vastness of my universe
yet, as you zoomed in closer
you found I wasn't much at all

running away
into
a maladaptive dream
impulsively
searching for more
dopamine

forgetting to
mourn
the losses and
discarding
all the old
belongings

playing pretend
ignoring
heart and soul
shredded
to pieces once
again