I don't want to seem weird but every night
I stay awake I don't sleep
because...
I'm scared of closing my eyes
I'm scared of seeing darkness
but one day I know ill be able to close my eyes
I want to be able to do that
and I want to be able to stop cutting
the blood makes me feel alive and helps me through everything that is happening in my head

it's me
whoever that is
to be honest, I hate myself
I'm not worth it
I want people to stop caring about me so I can stop caring about them
I want to love myself
and I want to accept my self the real me
the one that can be proud to say I'm gay
because all they do is bring me down
my parents love me but not the real me

You showed me what fake really is
You promised to many things
You always said this or that
At the end
you were a *****
You changed up
even if u knew how that felt
I tried to tell you but you changed even more
I gave us too many chances
now we are done
your playing like your the victim
but in the end, you ain't ****
And yes I might seem like a *****
but I move as you move
And well if you don't like me anymore move away from me
I knew you were fake when you talked **** about everyone I dated
When I got heartbroken you were never there but thanks for nothing and that's what your gonna get from me nothing
Bye ***** ***

Why do I keep falling for fake love?
Why do I always get hurt at the end
When I fell I couldn't stop
you caught me
But it was a web of ******* lies
Having you means dying a little
Everyday
I thought having you
Was really the best thing ever
But…..
having you was the worst thing that
Ever happened to me
Your kisses were all lies

But what is a shadow really?
Is it a happy ending or a dark past
But is there really a thing such as a happy ending
Maybe you are just happy at the beginning
But are we tired of hiding what we are feeling
Or tired of having emotions

Do you ever think about something sad
Before you go to sleep
You see the shadow of
your dark past
Do you ever fall in love
With words

Or with ideas or thoughts but do we
Really ever fall in love with actions
Maybe you picture your life
Full with happiness
maybe you
Already meant the person you
Gonna spend the rest of your life with
But the hardest thing is to let go of the things
You never had

Do you ever hate getting flashbacks
Of things you don't want to remember
There are things that
We don't want to happen
But we have to learn to
Except it
But without those things we are not
Ourselves
you can say to yourself
“Am used to it”
But that's one of the saddest things to say
You can give your heart
To a person but they choose
what to do with it

Something can be part
Of your life then taken away
Like nothing
Maybe you are the person
Who tries to keep everyone
Happy but are you happy?

Do you live in a shadow and can’t face reality
And then life hits you harder
than you thought
Maybe you are fighting
A battle that has no end
But sometimes you
Have to pretend everything is ok
Maybe people think that
Everything that a shadow is
That is it a dark area or shape produced by
a body coming between rays of light
But a shadow can be something that
You are hiding from
Shadows can be the
Feelings that you try to hide always dark
Empty, alone

you can always try to
Keep your face in the sunshine
And your shadow will follow
Love can be a trap
When we fall
We only see the light not
The shadow
The word “happy”
Can lose the true meaning
If it can't be balanced
With sadness
We all have stories
But do we always like
The dark past or the shadow that
You are hiding

We can feel like no one cares
We can cry
But it doesn't mean we are weak
It means that we have a heart
Maybe you see a person
If someone is quiet all the time it could mean they are full
Of pain
We can put walls up but
Not to keep the people
Out but to see if they care enough to knock them down
GOOD FRIENDS care for each other..CLOSE FRIENDS understand each other,
But TRUE FRIENDS stay forever.
.beyond words, beyond distance, beyond time..!!
So do we really ever have this person
Or is it all fake life, love everything
Rain races through air at rage like rocks ripping
But why do rocks hurt less
Then a broken heart
But have the dignity to stand up for
Yourself and do what's right, not what will
Get you not noticed life is hard but
you
Can make it

Everyone
asks me “are you okay”
What do I say…
I just want to die
I don't understand life
And I know that I'm dumb for saying
that...
but no one loves me
I know that I might be someone someday but..
until that day
I'm just trash...
and I'll never be more than
that I understand that I **** up a lot
but that's part of life
I wish
I could be perfect so...
I could be the daughter that you wanted
But...
I don't think that's possible
all you can do is wish

I know that you don't care about yourself
But please don't ever lose yourself
You have to fight for
What you believe in
Even if everyone is against it
It's not always your fault
Get that the **** out of your head
Please stop lying
Be straight to your self  
Be yourself
Even if people don't like it be you
Cause you are worth it
You might not see it right now
But trust me you are
The thought of losing myself makes
No sense in my head
Nobody gonna trust you like I trust you
nobody gonna love you like I do
I love you

Okay
well hello
today
well I went to school and there was a fight
and that was fun
my dad came to pick me up 2 hours late
I liked it I had some time to myself
then he started crying
that he hates my mom hurting me
and that he would do anything for me even leave my mom
that broke me
I don't want that
but sometimes I feel like that's for the best


(put your thoughts in the comments tell me how today was )

Hold on
I just need a moment
I say I'm okay
But…
Isn't that what we all say
I try to control me
But that is what controls me
All the time
the voices in my head
They Say...
You're not worth it
So just say goodbye cause
Tomorrow I'll be dead I can
Only hope
But in the end, maybe I'm not worth it
But...
You are your so much more
You are the whole world to me
And to so much more people
So you
Yes you
Are worth it
So hold on really tight  
You are so much more

Life is nothing
when it all comes to an end
there's no going back
we might think there's an afterlife
but what really happens when we die
maybe our eyes or the sense that we use goes to waste
and all we see is darkness
What happens to all the people that committed crimes
what is a crime how does “God” see it
but then there's another question is God real
is hell real
What if the life we are living is all a lie
what if we are set up like this
what is a sin?
is it being part of the LBGTQ+ community
is it still ****** if you help the death penalty
who chooses what the biggest crime is ?
we see terrible things happen every day and we don't do anything about it
why do we stand there and do nothing
what if we could do something to stop something bad from happening most people wouldn't care
but doesnt god say to treat everyone like your brother or sister
but at the end we all sin
Death
where does death take us
why does death come too early
why does “ God” choose that
is “God” a sinner