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  Feb 2018 Nicole-Lisa Jackson
Georgia
If you don't choose a side you either fall through the crack and die or you create your own platform and survive,
you just gotta chose life over death
but sometimes it's really just not what you want
Because If you put a gun up to my head
I'd beg for the trigger to be pulled
But if you handed me the gun
I'd put it back down
Because my heart couldn't **** me
But my head wishes nothing more...
'Maybe my heart would be warm dead cause it's so cold alive'
She was a normal teenage girl

Until...

Her mind became an enemy

Her body a battlefield

And her life a sacrifice
I miss you a lot
But I don't want to talk to you
I don't want to hear how great things are since you left
Or how happy you are without me
I don't want to hear the things you've forgotten
Maybe I don't miss you

I miss who I thought you were
Welcome to our generation
where kids pretend to smile
When in reality
They're broken
Beat
Hurt
Tired
And they just want to die
Welcome to our generation
Where kids self-harm
Starve themselves
And make themselves throw up
The generation that tries to die
This is our generation
The generation that wants hide
The generation that wants to die
Don't touch it or touch upon it; but you can stare at it from afar and observe it
Think of how that wound happened
What circumstances
What could be done to prevent a wound like that to happen again
Prepare defenses
Strategies
To evade a wound the pain once again
But make sure to acknowledge the wound for what it is
How it is making you grow
How it is making you becoming stronger through your sheer will not to be a hurt by a wound like this again
6 o'clock
To me 6 o'clock is the best part of the day
In the morning, the sun rises, revealing its vast assortment of colors
Pinks, purples, blues, yellows, reds
The sky is a canvas
At 6 o'clock the canvas is painted
Then quick as can be is washed away
The colors, they disappear one by one
Each color fading back into blue
Pinks
Purples
Yellows
Oranges
Reds
All gone
And with it, my happiness

Each day I am heartbroken
Beat
Whipped
Punched
Slapped
Abused
The sunrise is my get away, symbolizing the beginning of a new day; new beginnings
There is no one yet awake
No one to
Punch
Beat
Slap
Abuse me
Each evening, at 6 o'clock
The sun sets, letting me know that I have lived another day
But for every day I live, there are thousands more I have not lived
But have yet to live
Sometimes,
I have dreams of running away
But who would be there to help
Surely no, except for myself
The idea is absurd
So instead
At 6'oclock
When the sun rises, and when the sun sets
I watch, wait, and hope.
Life is unexpected
A cold breeze, wild current, no one can say they love it without truly understanding it
Life is complicated
A never ending series of broken glasses and melted ice cream on a hot summer day
Life is odd
Changing at every turn like a road of infinite numbers. Every ending is only a new beginning
Life is big
A shadow that covers the wide and great outdoors, like an umbrella that covers you from the teary sky
Life is mysterious
The meaning I'm trying to define
For you that is to figure out

— The End —