Bed ridden..
Heart broken..
Miss spoken...
I've been through it all
And right now
There will be no more...
"Because I can no longer hold up my walls"
I'll Let my walls c r a c k
And s h a t t e r
and c.l.a.t.t.e.r and b r e a k
And then everyone can see
Who I really am, a total mistake...
Not a word will be said, not a tear shed..
As I let emotions leak through, these old worn down bricks..
And wash me out
Leaking my infectious behavior
Draining these betrayed feelings
None of them will be missed..
Maybe then
People like me.. won't have any doubt
Maybe then I can, yell at the top of my lungs with frustration and shout..
"Maybe then"
"My world will change" you tell me
But maybe then..
My stupid ******* heartlessness will come back into range
And then there will be no love
No morsel of respect..
Meeting me I promise you is something to regret
Maybe it's better to be alone..
Maybe it's better to be unloved
Because when you get to know me well...
*Push comes to shove

You spin a lovely story
A web made out of silk
Full of fictitious behavior
But
Do you ever feel the guilt?
Do you ever see the blood, or the tears that you have spilt?
You feed off happiness
And leave people alone in the blackness
You are your own fears
And my very worst nightmare..

"I'm getting over her"
Oh  yes I'm sure you are
But not before you decide to hit me with a ******* car
My advice was, to nice, to generous to you and when I gave you some ******* slack you played me like a fool..
See my emotions are not to be "played with"..
Especially not by you
Considering the fact that you can't even see what's true..
She uses and she loses
And when you're lost, you'll know, that she's the type of person that always comes and goes..

Tears are
f
a
l
l
I
n
g.
There
C o l l e c t i n g ..
C o l l i d i n g
C r a s h i n g
Into what once was beautiful memories of me and you
I'm drowning in the salt water
Bubbles are forming at the top
My heart is about to stop
There is no us
And I'll be a good little girl and I won't put up a fuss..
So if you really don't love me, let me blow of some steam and let me drown in these
puddles of fallen salt water dreams...

They took me away from it all..
Made me start over
Took me to the hospital again and called me "Crazy"
Told me to take my medication
Told me to sleep without any worries
Told me that everything was going to be okay, if I **** my... pills
Forced me into therapy
Made me talk about my "Problems"
P r e t e n d e d ..
Like I was going to get better
Or at least humored it
Now I sit alone
Like usual
I told you I needed you..
That
I needed a place to stay
S o m e o n e
S o m e t h I n g..
But no..
You told me you had to much "Anxiety"
That I needed to "figure things out"
That you wouldn't "let me in your door" if I ran to you
Because I needed you..?..
Who says that, when someone needs them?
What kind of a person..
And then you go and write a poem about me the same me you wouldn't even open your door for..
I mean seriously can I not... trust anyone..
And I love how after all of this I'm still considered the "Crazy one"
After what you did
Did you even take the time.?.
Did you know that I was going to **** myself?
Maybe you did..
But you still wouldn't open your door
You
Didn't listen...
And now..
Now..
Well, I think I'm going "Crazy"..

How am I supposed to understand
You
I mean what do you expect me to d o
You claim not to like me "that way"
And it hurts but I except it
And then you go and neglect that feeling
And leave me feeling electric..
I don't know how I should feel anymore....
I don't know what you want...
But I know that
When you leave
this broken heart you will *haunt