Nellie 55

Nellie 55 Apr 11

💯

Grandma i spend my nights plotting my next letter to send to you. I bet you're sleeping and dreaming. Dreaming of your hummingbird. I'm at home finding something to listen to you. I'd spent my nights drinking my life. I had wished I listened to your night. It's 4am here and bar close over there. Grandma i wish I was there. A drink of a beer on top of the world, dancing to Elvis tunes. Sometimes I wish we hadn't moved.

Nellie 55 Apr 9

Grandmas Hummingbird

The sound of stress when you're humming
A beautiful bird has been summoned
Tell me more about that hummingbird
Seems like when I'm distress a bit of you sings a hum for me too
I wish that I'd be able to fly to you
Hugs and love
To the moon and back
I miss my grandma wish she'd take me back to a time when nothings all that important
Just a adventure jamming to some Elvis and watching VHS tapes to enjoy a night
But lately my worlds crumbles I'm losing a fight
I swore upon fallen angels but this hummingbird took flight
Is that you're spirit guiding mine?
Lately I've been avoiding the world like a plague
Wish I was back home in isolation instead
I revisit movies, I relive some moments, and I jam like my world depends on it.
I began humming in hopes your hummingbird rescues me.

Nellie 55 Apr 9

Sobriety pleads

Bring me to the day I chose alcohol, where did I begin to fall off. I've blackout the right spots. Hit that so hard for a battle I've already lost. **** I've forgot. Warm me up in this headed conversations, I've lost the right to learn my lessons. Once in control, out with another bottle. Dad show me how to be whole again, my sister's are drain from me calling in. Rarely good news I've been lost at sea. Drowning under our feet. Tears forming, wrist bleeding, and some anxiety retreating. Never have I ever been so out of luck, atleast I got drunk. Killing my success, it's in the back of my trunk. Driven myself mad, I want out so dearly bad. I need to better me back.

Nellie 55 Apr 9

......idk began writing lol enjoy

You've touched me to avoid me, heart aches with the advantages of my body being used with no hesitation. Correct my intentions, this is a ****** situation.
Putting my persons pace in prison. Changing me with manipulation. Using my flaws as your charms. Open wide with fingers crossed I seek save haven. Some **** can't be forgiven. From a rise there once upon a fall. Guarantee whiskey shots and some fireball. The now me would go back to tell me. There's a beautiful girl waiting on my howdy. She's perfect in every way possible. The key to her is to fix myself. Correct that mental health. Do the success for me, little wins to gain that trophy. Sometime you have to stick to yourself even if it's a bit lonely.

Nellie 55 Apr 5

Waiting, hopefully goes well

If I can't convince you that I want you, no one else will. I've gone back and forth through hell countless times, I know you don't wanna be left alone still. Much rather you hurt me now and admit that you lost interest in me. Darling I don't need much convincing, just a man working hoping to capture love. Pieces fall from my chest, where I'd like your head to rest. The screams, the songs, the beats, and the sounds of blood pumping my veins. Ghosting me isn't new to me, it's just another dark place. Maybe I brought up too much heat I don't blame you for throwing yourself in the shade. I'll always be ready if you're serious.

Nellie 55 Apr 3

No title just feelings and over thinking

I remain interested if I'm not the only one putting in the effort. I began asking myself questions like...
Who is interested in now?
Is he better than me?
Am I a creepy?
What did I do to feel at defeat?
I'm as ready as I'll ever be.
A good man still standing on my feet.
Most have agreed, the wrong ones had disrespected me.
I think I'd much rather be hurt now than build walls with you.

Nellie 55 Mar 26

Venom maybe??🤔

Someone help me love again. Help me with a world that should be mine, the snakes bit me from the grass with some heavy venom that left me open. I just need some time. Stay for me as you'll ever possibly can. I'm getting bit alive. When I survive..... I'll be ready for her to mine!