I chose to admire from a distance
Chose to fall in love in silence
I'd much rather dream while your smile drives me restless when I can't sleep
Would rather love and adore you from a safe distant away from your gaze
Would rather get over you in days
Rather than spend my whole life dealing with the rejection you gave
Would much rather skip a rock against your waves because I'd be able to control the skips before I drowned down to a dark place
I'd rather day dream a cliche
In silence I'd treat you the best anyone had offered you
But again.....
I'm better off staying silent
All because I know my action screamed but I'm not of worthy
Would rather fall in love and let go all in the same day.
But baby trust me when I say,
In silence I've loved you life time after life time in silence full of life.

I've been a mess without me.
All I've wanted was to make accomplishments with you.
Thought I've found another safe space.
Built these walls to guard my mental place.
I've never wanted any break ins, tell that bad wolf to hold his breathe, I plan to blow myself away.
I thought I wanted a whole new life with you, until you lied me awake.
Only lies I wanted was the wraps around each other arms. Now I hope this pain stays away. I hate the way you got me
Devastated from the rollercoaster full of what ifs and buts along with the hate and adore. Was hard to ignore.
You're knocking and pounding on my doors, now these bricks I've rebuilt crack and break on the floor.
How did this piggy become the wolf when I was the one attempting to huff and puff your love away?

I've always know this had been over
But your attention had you laying on my chest and shoulder
What's the hell am I to do when I try to climb and get over?
I've always thought you wanted what I wanted
The what ifs and how's that?
Feels a lot more worse than a closer loved one stabbing my back
You showed me hardly any emotion
Called me out for not showing enough
You'd already givin up
As I'm repairing **** that'll continue to break up
Now my inner sides scream in agony with tears shoving me back into the night when we'd dance with the waves
Had no idea they were your waves to me

Let the thoughts be a lot more quiet
I wish my mental health would stay silent
Can I please be happier
I shouldn't struggle this hard to fake a smile

I've learned to rest when I need sleep, it's always different when you're next to me. Here baby, I've got comfortable clothes, I'll hold your hands when your cold. Want my hoodie and my coat? Let's watch our babies get old. Be there on their high and lows. Roll me up, smoke me up, wish to hold you my love. My partner and my best friend, I never want our time to end.
The way you look at me, the way you kiss me
The way I hold you, the way you let me too
I want to grow with you
My plus one against the world I hope it stays just us two