When you exist to not exist
When the colors of your hair are bathed in the deepest green of absynthe
When it's quiet but never been so excruciatingly pervasive
Where can I find my peace
Are we in balance or just in limbo?

Finally, finally, you see
life was not meant to be easy
Stop counting the ways in which the world forgot to do you a favor
You'll be far more proud of all the times you got up
when your ribs were crushed
Your face shoved in the mud
Everything stripped away
And you kept on going anyway
You have to hit rock bottom before you can make sense of your climb
You can only kiss the feet of giants
when you have tasted the defeat's sobering red wine.

What was it you were looking for?
Someone to hold you close and keep you warm?
Someone for you who will brave the storm
of the O'ercast and unlit path
Someone who dreams of you the way you can never see yourself
Or who takes the place of morning liquors
Who holds your hand into the sky
Who draws your aching lips neigh

But who could they be
This mystical, shapeless human dream?
A fantastical illusion of mass "perhaps"
Drink down the bitter relapse
They are not the one
And neither are you

The thing about life is I don’t think there’s just one overlaying statement for all of humanity
We ask “Why?” but I don’t think we realize that, truly, out of nearly 7.4 billion people, there cannot possibly be an answer as to why we all exist. There cannot be one simple statement to define the reason as to why every single person of this race, our race, exists, because everyone has a different reason for it.
Or maybe that’s the answer
Maybe the answer to “Why?” is “Because there are 7.4 billion different reasons.”
Maybe it’s just that everyone has their own answer to why.
I remember I used to think that the reason we all existed was because the only other option was to not exist. But I think it’s not that simple, modern humans aren’t so primitive and instinctual anymore, our sixth sense has been forgotten somewhere, dormant in our genes, our very DNA.
The most modern **** species, **** sapien sapien, is a far more mentally evolved being from the first **** species. And because of that, our reasoning for living has evolved with us. There are, indeed, 7.4 billion answers to “Why?”, but I think that’s the overall answer for our species.
“Why?” “There are 7.4 billion reasons. Mine is __.”
Nonetheless, life is a beautiful thing. Find your reason.
And, maybe, just maybe, make it something a little more than existing just because the only other option is not existing.
:;,

How can I not chase it?
The rapidly fading,
No-chance-to-hold-near,
Elusive and routine-extinguished it
That something that makes you want to quit your job
Makes you want to sell your things
And cut off all connections with people who have stopped halfway to the finish line
The thing that frightens you when you think it has passed you by
How can I not chase that illuminating, soul awakening,
Widely possible yet technically implausible it?