I must be served first--let others wait.

How can I make you
any promise?  Weak
so weak I am-- too many
I made to myself and broke--too ashamed to speak

after the events--damage I would cause you
and your hopes to the ground I'd smash
forgive me, my friend,  myself I can't trust
to say further is mere balderdash.

A friend sought your intervention
as he had fallen out with a mutual friend -
Beware!

Yes, I am your friend
          only insofar
          you don't impinge on my self-interest
           or step on my little toe.

Here
there
somewhere
anywhere
everywhere--

beware!

The worst place
to be
is where I don't belong
where I cease to be free

and those who claim
to be in authority
announce loudly:
you ****, get out--- immediately!

If you come to Australia
Be sure not to wear some flowers in your hair
Aussies are down-to-earth and not poetical people
For floral beauty they don't really care

If you do come to Australia
The qualification you must have is drinking beer
Everyone in the pub (especially young pretty Aussie women)
Will hug you till you weep--otherwise, please don't come here!

Many things we humans
can set aside
the hardest by any definition
is our pride

standing at the centre
of our being
like the Commander- General
and saying: ' I'm either EVERYTHING or nothing!'

Goodbyes
even for a while
bring tears to my eyes

Partir, c'est mourir un peu--it's true
each time a little we die
but life is such--what else could we do?

This I do know
every moment we should love and cherish
before we pack up our bags to go

to our next destination in life--faraway
who does know whether we would meet again
on a distant future day?

The law is the law
It must be upheld though it contains a flaw

THE RELUCTANCE OF WORDS

Sometimes, nay, often- words shy away
I have to be patient and wait
I set aside all thoughts--hoping later
to find the gems and celebrate.

With words I live all our life
I learnt just a few as a child--enough then-
just a few simple words  brought such joy and delight
words have outgrown me since--now I have to woo them as a friend.

Violin music floats in the cold midnight air
echoing over and over again
who is the player?
the music seems to speak of so much pain

Who, who are you out there?
I don't know you but can feel
the depth of sorrow in your lonely heart
are you saying: Lost love would never heal?

Reason confuses
its foundations are shaky
intuition rules

Words-
do they know
and understand more
than us?

they seem independent
they are unto their own
and in their quest
for freedom
they set us aside

so often
they hold us back
they contradict
and find fault
with us

who is the servant
and who is the master?

All sorts of rooms I've entered
save one I don't have the key
the room of your heart I can't unlock
you are a complete mystery

yet you stare deep into my eyes
as though to say you want me
but  when I *draw close to you
you walk away without the slightest stint of pity.

The mind asks:
'What is love?'
The heart answers:
' What a stupid question!'

Don't say goodbye
say you will come back to me

Don't say: I want love
instead say: How much love can I give?

The day comes
and quickly goes
would it be joys?
no one knows

But be steadfast in hope
let love fill your heart--be strong-
evening sets in and night descends
the day is well-lived and is your cherished song

'  I know more than my dad--I live in the modern age'.
Before you address your dad,
Beware!

It's harder to be not
     than to be
     yet the former
     makes me truly happy

Action in many cases
causes more problems that it seeks to solve.
Inaction is often wise.

You come to me
where ever I am, near or far away
at your will
over which I have no say--

never had I compelled
love to suit my way
only that you would
your own heart obey.

Ah, my beloved,  I struggle
not knowing what to say
(words are feeble and they fumble
nay, they shiver and quiver...so little they convey).

You come to me
be it the depth of night or the break of day
at your will and this is all to me you say
'  Light of my heart, let me love you this way'.

How I long for those teenage days
patiently I did write and post
my letters and postcards -
replies received---times happier than most.

But the Internet
has dampened our hearts and sentiments
the cold piece of machine faces and mocks us
forever lost our halcyon moments

By all means, be harsh with yourself
but
be gentle towards others, even to the undeserving

FANTASY

I am the tiny, lonely pebble
on the distant shore
you are the rising tide
I am waiting for

to find and carry me
to the passionate and endless sea
let me then drown in your slivery
*****--in your kisses I would die blissfully.

The mind can't understand why
       the heart is dancing even in the rain

You do not win because you are smart
you have first to acquire the winning-art

I went to the desert
           hopefully myself to discover
           only to return empty-handed
           none the wiser.

           In my dream last night
           a strange voice spoke to me:
           '  a thousand deserts won't do you any good
           only you alone can set yourself free'.

Heroes belong to myth
and history
the word
frightens me

Daily heroic acts there are
hidden from public view but clothed silently in sacrifice
who are my heroes?
my beloved parents as seen through my eyes

The elderly-they
have dreams too
like the young

but
when they get up
they don't want to recall

not with the young
who want to go back to sleep again
their dreams are real
and they can't let  go--
love so tempting
beauty so alluring
passions so compelling
hopes so promising
(between the dreaming and waking
is a thin line--miracles in the making?)
'Those who dare dream
transmute sand into gold
and what could be stronger than the ardour of youth' ?
they claim

here is where the difference lies:

the dreams of old age are angst-full
burnt-out and decaying fields
that have swallowed once red -blooming roses
and left behind a trail of desolation and tears
( dreams that return but to mock and chastise)

dreams are partial to youth
and resurrect to punish the old

Don't love me much
a little bit will do me fine
just say to me a few words--such-
'You'll always be mine'.

I don't know why
some sunsets make me sad
I stare at the fading sun
as I had
done in times past-   memories
still linger on somehow
(what entered my feelings then-
why should they affect me now?)
this I can only surmise
evenings are hours that languish
as the heart that seeks comfort and rest
the day's troubles wishes to relinquish

what would I dream of tonight
in a realm hidden from human sight?

Does the fool
have a brain?
you snob, you brute
I'll box you if you say this again!

The first lie is the hardest
all others
are easy

That which is rigid its own boundaries  sets
  that which is stretchable goes a long way
  that which is tall  unwanted attention attracts
  that which is low and humble wins the day

The mind asks questions over and over again
the heart knows the answers without having to undergo such pain

We seem to be the product
more of moods than reason

WORDS
Words are meant not for truth
but for deception and self-justification
the most used and refined human tool
the product of the highest civilisation.

Be a master of this art
all else you can set aside then
the crown of life you will wear
you will be the leader of all men.

' Live well'--two words that transcend the highest philosophy
  It's up to you--unless you want to live in self-imposed misery

You do yourself wrong
thinking
it is angst to be waiting

waiting
is
life's testing

of your patience
and endurance
preparing

you for tougher trials ahead
and looking
back--you will be thanking

life
for every opportunity
to be waiting

the greatest gift you will be receiving
is when you have taught your heart
to wait for love's sweetest ripening

An old man am I
too old but I hang on
still too young to die

and not wanting to die
means wanting to live--to write-
come and visit me if  you should pass by

Does the fool have any friend
under the sun?
being self-sufficient and away from the world's madness
he really needs none

Time said to me, pompously
'I have had enough of you
don't you realise
I have done you favours--many?

I replied, not angrily
but soberly:
'  I asked for none
  all that I did or
  didn't do
  throughout my life
was the outcome
of my being born into the world
to play my small part
lest I fail myself and others around

how could I have taken advantage of you
as you are known
for your parsimony?
indeed mankind regards
you as tyranny

I count you neither
as friend or enemy

you have your things to do
and I have mine
it was you who raised the question
we should just stop talking
I have work to do
responsibilities to bear--so many

You have had enough of me?
but I have the right to be around
life is an open book
and a real democracy
so, respect my right to be
my integrity
I am not a garrulous
or recalcitrant person
just a simple bloke
who likes to live a quiet life
taking care of my own business
and not one
to poke my nose
into what others do
as you are doing
right now to me

I want to keep my boundary
and not have you lecturing to me
I am a free man, in every way--free
don't you have the humility
to understand and see?

You have had enough of me
it's your opinion
do I really have to listen) ? '

I should not say:
Let me understand life first  before I start living
but rather:
Let me live life first before I start to understand it.

Most people seem to be chasing
   the things that mean least
   in the garden of life they ignore the flowers
   on the weeds their eyes instead feast

Does the past have
an 'expiry date'
as in merchandise
'best consumed by...' ?

If I had no past
what am I then?
could it be obliterated and meet
with a sudden end?

The mind is only a country,
the heart is a whole continent

The world  is but my perception-
beyond that nothing exists.
That my perception is totally wrong makes no difference.

A flicker of light
is not seen or felt in the day
but shows its glitter
at night