I’m here against my own will,
So here goes nothing.
Hi. My name’s Naty & I’m a lovaholic.
I can’t tell you how many years it’s been,
I’ve lost count to be honest.
However here’s an interesting bit of information that might help your understanding.
My addiction was implanted in me since the day I was conceived, so being that I grew up around addicts, I’m not surprised that I am one myself.
But unlike the others, my vice wasn’t one that could be placed back on the shelf.
Mine comes from the heart, it gives me energy, yet it drains me, some nights it drives me crazy.
I fall asleep choked up in anxiety, wake up feeling the same, but who is really at fault?
Is it my DNA or my surroundings?
Because I grew up in a very affectionate environment,
Something I find myself apologizing for often.
At times I felt like wearing my heart on my sleeve was a blessing, but I’ve shook hands with men who happened to secretly take pieces of it with them.
I’ve put myself through rehab more times than I care to remember, relapsing has become a second nature.
Forgive me if my words sound slurred, it’s just that I’m high right now
I’ve been high for nine months, although the journey’s been great, I’m ready to get clean and start over.
I want to remember what my life was like when I was sober.
I came to you for help, do you think I can be saved, since I’m so far along?
I just need one chance, one chance to prove to myself that I’m still strong.