the blade was not dull
& the blood's already
started to flow.

ladies & gentlemen,
enjoy the show

because this is
what you created.



*(mer)

did i make it that
easy for you to
just walk out of
my life without
making you
despairing?

you abandoning me
tore me to pieces.

why aren't you
broken as well?

was i not
enough?

but i loved you...




*(mer)

you breathe in when i exhale.

you don't notice, but i do.

oh, how i wish you were mine.




*(mer)

i thought
you were
the
bandage,
but you
were the
wound.



*(mer)

i used all my wishes on you
from blowing dandelions
to eleven:eleven
to shooting stars
to tossing coins
to fallen eyelashes
to breaking wishbones
to blowing candles
to crossing fingers
to the first star i see tonight

but you're still
not here




& that makes me unbearably sad.



*(mer)

i can no longer
sleep in my own
bed because
at one time,
you were there
with me

& now you're
nowhere in sight.





*(mer)

i am meant to be alone.

i am meant to live alone,
sleep alone,
wake up alone,

i am meant to be alone.

& i don't know how i feel about being alone.




*(mer)