Winter surrounds me.
grey and charcoal clouds stretch horizon to horizon
wind howls over a white land
I cry and my face burns
but under the shivering is a summer’s warmth
my heart is a furnace that warms my soul
soft eyes and ethereal touch, with each embrace, each kiss,
the steel around my heart grows red, casting a golden glow
you are and always will be my fire

Sometimes the mind is sharp, but the body is failing
Limbs that hang useless now form a prison as strong as steel bars

Sometimes the body is healthy, and the mind is lost
The world beyond the eyes unknown and confusing

The glow of living is blocked,
as quickly as grey clouds blown by hurricane winds cover the sun

From tears of joy to tears of grief
God is behind the curtain
Heaven is a promise that can’t be broken

There she was covered in her mother’s nourishment.
The doctor removed the cord and freed her spirit.
The nurse fussed, wrote, cleaned, and wrapped her in her
Gender’s color.
Being experienced with first timers she bent and adjusted my arms
And hands creating a cradle to place my daughter.
No crying, only a dove’s coo. Eyes like Caribbean seas stared up as
She nestled in soft and sweet as a chick.
A bell sounded.
Cathy looked on sweat glistening and spent and smiling.
That wonderful smile, her smile
In a moment my eyes truly opened.
Just a moment.
Such a moment. There she was covered in her mother’s nourishment.
The doctor removed the cord and freed her spirit.
The nurse fussed, wrote, cleaned, and wrapped her in her
Gender’s color.
Being experienced with first timers she bent and adjusted my arms
And hands creating a cradle to place my daughter.
No crying, only a dove’s coo. Eyes like Caribbean seas stared up as
She nestled in soft and sweet as a chick.
A bell sounded.
Cathy looked on sweat glistening, spent and smiling.
That wonderful smile, her smile
In a moment my eyes truly opened.
Just a moment.
Such a moment.

My brain sits on a bed of white-hot embers,
        Feverish with nightmares of failure and loss.
My heart is a furnace burning in passion for a love no more.
She who’s cool body wrapped mine and moist kisses quenched
        the blaze is gone.
Her tender soul and ethereal ways now watch over from so very far
        away.
My soul is ashes.
Above flies a phoenix.
Many eyes look up filled with awe and inspiration.
My flames are fanned by the mighty wings.
          I’ve become the fire. I will burn forever.

Between my dreams and reality,
Lies the lens I peek through
And capture my illustrated story

I travel the back roads
Running to places I cannot return to
I am not lost

When
            Did will be
Become would have been?