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Megan Jul 2014
i'm sitting
on pins and needles
until next thursday
when i get to see
the person i'm in love with
for the first time
in a month.
Megan Jul 2014
people say
'not until
it's set in stone.'

but people forget
even stones
erode.

|m.s.
Megan Jul 2014
i'm come to a conclusion
after staying up late
for so many days.
i've decided
at two, and three, and four
in the morning
that i love you
more than i'll ever love myself.

|m.s.
Megan Jul 2014
i found a letter from
two years ago
that i wrote to someone
expressing my feelings for him.
i never gave it to him.
it's been two years
since we've talked
face to face.
there was a time
he visited me at my work
and we were both
so shaky,
our thoughts flustered.
i wonder what would
of happened
two years ago
if i gave him that
letter.
"I like you. I believe I have for a while now and I didn't know until we were leaving."

|m.s.
Megan Jul 2014
it's 3 o'clock
and i'm up staring
at the screen of my computer
trying to put some
kind of thought together
some kind of string of words.
god, it's already july.
i've survived a month
but i'm not sure how much longer.
if you do call i'm going to end up crying
babbling out i miss you,
and then you're never going to want me.
because how does someone describe the sound
of tears hitting the comforter
of a quiet night--alone.
there's not a perfect way
of describing loneliness,
of how the weighing down
of your soul feels.
there's no easy way
to describe feelings
for someone.

there's no way.
and it may just be the fact
that i'm not old yet.
and i don't know what love is.
but if i didn't
why on this small world
would i feel like my heart
is being wrenched from my chest
and provided on some silver platter
to a god who's supposed to help you fall in love
his arrows work backwards.
if anything--they work in lines.
or perhaps they don't work at all,
and all of this is just some ruse.
because love is more than a battlefield.
it'll destroy you from the inside out
and you'll be left
leaking the brokenhearted.
leaving craters,
and a gaping hole
where the heart should of been
before it made desertion.


|m.s.
Megan Jul 2014
your eyes were green.
i started to notice
around the time i realized
i would be sitting next to you
for a long time.
when i shared this information,
you disregarded me,
with a glance in another direction
and told me they weren't.
but how would you know?
when i was the one
who saw them on a daily basis--
searching between them.
you told me they weren't green.
that they were brown.
after brief arguing
i met with you in the middle
made a compromise
and smiled.
they were a brown green then.
yet you still gave me one of your looks,
and the frown.

i noticed you didn't like talking about yourself.
well neither do i.
but they definitely weren't brown.
because i have brown eyes
and they're not like yours.

whenever i am around you
i am mostly happy.
green is a colour that is said to alleviate depression.
that offers harmony.
and i didn't see brown.
i saw green.

and your eyes were green.
and i started to notice
around the time i realized
i was falling in love with you.
but i saw much more
than just a colour.
they were much more
than just brown.

|m.s.
Megan Jul 2014
someone send help
because i'm madly in love
and he doesn't know
and i know
i won't ever tell him.
and once upon a time
we danced, and i fell
into his arms, and into him
just a little bit more,
someone send help
because i'm madly in love
and it hurts me he'll never know.

|m.s.
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