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Megan Apr 2014
you wonder why i reacted
the way i did
when she shut me down
without glancing at me.
and whatever was
my response
don't put out my fire.
i'm excited.
Megan Apr 2014
in seventh grade
my hair turned blue.
it was my hairstylist's mistake.
the black mixed with the blond.
but none of that is important.
what is important is
in seventh grade
my hair turned blue
and the words that followed
this statement being made aloud
used to be an embarrassment.
i used to be embarrassed
by what my teacher had told me
when really i should have listened.
when he overheard
and saw blue hair.
he told me something:
that i am a strong,
independent woman.
and that no matter
what life throws at me
whether it be blue hair,
or green hair,
or anything else.
i can hold my chin up.
i should have been
anything but embarrassed.
because that set of words
that mini speech in front of my peers,
has to be one of the most important parts
of my middle school years.
  Apr 2014 Megan
Fudz Lana
Your eyes are telling a tale
Everywhere you go

Your steps are making rhythms
silent and slow

Your head was never high
Nor does your voice

Every tremble of your hands
Every quiver on your lips
I know.
for my lovely friend who had thought for all these years no one has seen the pain in his eyes or the anxiety on his face. I miss you. be strong.
Megan Apr 2014
so it seems
this saturday
i'll be the one girl
on the sidelines.
i guess that's okay.
dancing really isn't my forte.
it just hurts to know that
yes had been the reply
but no had been the answer.
Megan Apr 2014
i feel like
my body
is aligning
with the stars.
and i'm just losing myself.
i need an anchor,
before i fly to outer space
to become one with the stars
and shatter.
i need something to hold on to
so why can't that
something
just be
your
hand?
Megan Apr 2014
there are certain things--
mostly your smile..
that i want to capture
in a jar.
use it to light up
those dark nights
where i'm up with the stars, crying.
where a rift has started
within the fibers of my being
threatening to slowly tear
myself apart.
piece by piece
i'll give away
to those i think deserve.
i'd save my heart for you.
but i'm not sure you'd want it.
it's darkened over the years,
and it's cracked
and broken
with quick fix
compromises and repairs
with faulty glue
band aids
and cheap tape.

i want to capture your smile
and use it to light up those nights
so i'll have more time
to repair my heart
for you.
Megan Apr 2014
i guess it's time
i take a step back
once again
i've come to this decision
to walk away.
i'm coming to realize
that having feelings for you
only hurts.
i know you're not over her.
and i've tried. but this time
i'll try as a true friend
rather than a friend
with hidden intentions.
to you, i shouldn't change much
or at all
but to me, you'll less become
the person i want to hold
to the person i should be holding
differently, all along.
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