Most people would take a look at us
and say I'm "catching feelings".
What is it about having feelings
that makes me want to throw something?
Some days my lips ache to tease your neck
and others I want to break your jaw.
The most romantic and violent scenarios
play behind my eyes and yank my heart strings
in varying twisted formations and knots.
I don't know what I've "caught".
I don't know what I've been infected with,
but I don't want it anymore.
So take it away.  Cut the beast off it's chain.
These emotions are too fierce for me to handle.

Here I am, sitting, wondering
What you're thinking.
It's dangerous,
Your love.
It pulls on me in all the right places.
You're the king of my thoughts,
A ruler of my feelings.
I know this cannot be healthy.

I remember
The blanket
The movements
The warmth mixed with cold
The movie
That we weren't watching
The way you looked at me
And the way I felt
I wish
We could go back there
Right now.

Hey, you there,
I'm thinking of you.
We may not know each other well
And you may feel invisible,
But I am thinking of you.
Maybe it's because I'm an artist,
Because I'm sensitive,
And I think about all kinds of things
Like you.
Maybe it's because I'm curious, or bored,
Or just a little too involved.
Still,
Isn't it even just a little comforting
To know
That someone is thinking of you?

Are you the one
Or not?
Because I only have so much time,
Only have one life,
And I don't want to waste it.

I'd like to write a poem
To explain
Why I don't trust you
But I can't because
There are no words
For the fear, and the terror,
That I felt
As a young girl,
With no help,
Abused and deceived,
Forever changed
By all of those things
That I could not control.

He's different.
Fragile, quiet.
Unassuming.
He floats around,
Light as a cloud
That never comes down.
He's on his own level
No one else's
And he lives by his own rules
Makes his own choices.