You see these scratches and these bruises?
Me neither, I don't these phonies be a nuisance,
You see, I like to dread the poor in all the richness,
Put the wealthy on my hit list,
Look down upon the real, boys and girls and grant their wishes,
The schools don't like you cause you think like me,
Say you got nothing to offer cause you smell like ****,
And if the moment ever came, when we were higher than the trees,
We would look down at them and say "Oh, yo now I see"

This is my letter to myself,
And when you read this you'll be wise enough to see that life,
Ain't always what it seems,
I wish you happiness and wealth,
I know you lovin' every moment as the minute,
I always wanted to be sane,
I'm glad you made it this far,
I'm glad you made it this far.

Cause I'm gonna take in this anger and the amusement,
Yeah, it's confusing maybe cause I'm scared to lose it,
That every time I try to look into the future,
I see mistakes of the past,
Afraid to do to next what I did to the last,
It's passion, it's presence, it's lust, is it love?
Is it the action, it's the essence,
**** it, all the above,
That got me feeling this way,
And I know I made some mistakes,
When I opened up this letter,
I bet I'll remember this day.

You're pulling my threads apart,
Been pulling on one real hard,
Unravel my whole left arm,
I knew you would play that card,
You're cooler than ice cream carts,
You're melting the whole **** park,
Carving our names in bark,
You left your name in my heart,
I live on the same old street,
haven't been us in three whole weeks,
I haven't been up your sleeve,
And I don't have any excuses,
And if I can recall, you said in spite of it all,
We'd still be chill in the Fall and, no, it's not your fault,
For binding our hearts so tight, I think that maybe you're right,
We shouldn't have gotten so high, we should've just,
we should adjust.

This wasn't the way it was supposed to be.
We we're supposed to be together.
And now I sit here all alone,
Attempting to think of something clever.
                       I loved you.

Busy with a broad, a bitty, a girl, meant to mention that I never wanted to **** with your world, oh well, ain't lie, cant lie, love it, something about you give me something I always wanted. See I could say it to a ***** and it'd be meaningless, meaning that I dont ever see it being that real, now I feel, and I dont know how to deal, long leg, blonde hair, pretty girl you a steal. She a silent hero, chillin with the villains makin mad dinero, bitter with a vision n she's here all year bro, ****** up, drugged out, girl of the year though.

I'm try to talk to you, or rap to you, or say something that will last with you or stick with you, and maybe imma be that rapper that get to you. Written truths in a booth are rare, tryn find themselves at the top until they realize its just rainy clouds and colder air. All of em animals, cannibals, eatin children, rechannel em till theres nothing left, cant handle em. look, I'll be honest I ***** from waking up cause I'm nauseous coughin up ranchy *** popper rocks in the sink on the hook.

Stay out of trouble,
rebuttal,
probably gonna **** if we cuddle.
I smoked one too many singles someone pack a double.
Twenty ringers ain't fun for the lungs but they gatta be done,
someone pack another for the girl we gettin **** done.
Not, just chillin n smokin ***.
Smokin marijuana, you wanna do it or not?
Settle in, its not like its a ****** rock,
yeah she has one in the pocket but that **** would make you pop.
See for us it be okay,
take it and we sway,
have another popper and we feel it fade a way.
It comes back and it's great,
numb to the face and cant complain,
run with the flow, now whats my name,
I had to get it, I had it, now I'm insane.
Now you, scared you wont like the truth,
you like it as much as the youth,
but you wont let nothing diffuse the situation,
love n hate will make a mess,
your selfish habits wont have it so **** it just take a rest.
You figure that I'll just bewilder the thought of you as a villain but you can just call her a killer cause she gon keep up with the killin.
Wanna **** round with a beast, its only your head.
Better keep up with the girl or get back n rest while she pull ahead. Yeah, now she only smokin on the best,
she been nursing a mind to **** us all up n go to bed.
See we ready, come n get me,
hell, we been it all along.
You say you're not convinced, she says you should tag along.

I wish I was a sound, that no one else could hear,
a quiet little buzz, meant only for your ears.
You could keep me secret, I know you wouldn't share,
and even if you thought you might, I'm not sure they would care.
Shut out the word and listen here, and know I'm always close,
so when you nap you'll only hear, your quiet little ghost.

to think a thought, to think of me, is nothing I see fit to do.
my self and I, are not to be seen, not heard, but known as Me.
before I believed, in not believing in, I believed my beliefs were blind.
so now at all, if I believe,
I think I know there is none to find.

believe in the right,
believe in the wrong,
it matters not to the world.
the world has no feeling,
no emotion for you.
not one thing will matter,
not one thing you do.
so if when you do, these things that you do,
you think a thought just as I,
believe in more that just your beliefs,
these things matters not, if the life when we die.

I know not of afterlives,
I know nothing of a being, supreme.
I know I am self, and I am nothing,
in the eyes of the world, a burden.
where I will go, and be, when I die,
has nothing to do with me,
has nothing to do with the world which we house,
and nothing to do with what I believe.

I thought we could spend the moments together,
I thought we could wait for the snow,
to stay up all night with none other,
and tell you why I love you.

to late,
I'm sure,
another night,
another dream,
wasted on you,

I thought with the mind set too love,
I might stubble across the key,
or perhaps break down the doors,
to the ******* the inside,

for me,
if you could,
be here,
against me,
with me,

you know I'm dying inside,
my heart beside me,
shattered pieces,
that can not be replaced,

forever,
forever could see us,
but I think I'm at a loss,

I will always remember you,
as you are here,
right now.

I see you one more time,
its different than all the rest,
still glow, you do,
but stop, it has,
the feeling in my chest,
I thought that I would feel it,
I thought that it would show,
but now I sit, with you beside,
I come to find, I do not know,
for much to long, it was my all,
I'd dream of it, night and day,
but then that look, inside your eyes,
began, to slowly fade,
still love you, I do,
but you see, it is too hard,
we've yet to talk of all the things,
that continue to tare us apart,
in short to say, of all I'm sure,
the past has made me weak,
so if one day, we plan to talk,
I only ask, instead, we speak.

I don't know what to do now,
still in love, but now you're gone,
questions over and over again,
where the **** did I go wrong.

With careful words,
to make you smile,
as well as thoughts,
to keep you warm,
I only ever thought of you,
there's always calm,
before the storm.

Afraid,
what happens next,
am I now, just to leave?
I am broken, I am tired,
I am saddened, I am weak,
I miss all about you,
I am mad that you are gone,
I wish I could tell you,
I am sorry it went wrong,
but what am I to say?
for every passing moment,
is just another day gone by,
I want you here, but cant control it.

I never seem to learn,
no matter how straight the lesson,
and if at all I've learnt one thing,
theres nothing like a first impression,
impressions last forever,
no it wont ever fade,
that's why I think your here right now,
and with me everyday,
in my head,
my heart,
my all,
see all has changed,
you've made me tall,
with just that look,
that moment of time,
that moment of perfect,
that moment you're mine,
my days aren't so hectic,
no not when I see,
that look in you're eyes,
that moment of peace.

To my secret something,
the girl I once knew,
the girl I once loved,
the girl with no clue,

Often I would sit and dream,
of a life involving you,
not as secret,
not as was,
not as "something",
but something new,

Like what I've seen in film,
the feeling felt so right,
an average day,
a random class,
a girl, a look,
then love at sight,

Emeralds for eyes,
skin warm to the touch,
you're close,
I feel you,
I kiss you,
you blush,

Alone with me you were clear,
you made me feel amazing,
every second we ever had,
the entire time,
my heart was racing,

Hurt,
and I am ashamed,
its all ****** up,
and I'm to blame,
without you,
I am no man,
without you,
I am not the same.

i had a thing up with this girl,
but it turned out it was wrong,
its ended now,
so i just thought,
that i might right this song,
im not gonna whine,
im not gonna ****** cry,
instead il just say thank you,
for making me this new guy,
for opening my eyes,
cause now i see,
that everything that feels this good is never meant to be,
it still hurts you know,
inside of me,
so il wait patiently until it leaves.

but its not that simple,
see you cant just quit it,
when its deep inside of you,
when its what your livin,
see i get blamed for theft,
at least attempted,
cause people dont know that whole story,
step off,
if anyones to blame,
yeah its me,
come on haters let it out,
you can rip me piece to piece,
but leave her alone,
its not her fault im a ****** idiot you should know by now im ******,
so let me hear it,
cause imma only shrug it off,
cause you gon' judge me anyway so hommie get lost,
im not gon Change,
nah, i Can't,
so if thats what you want from me,
best i can do is rant.

i do this for me,
all alone in the dark,
to only past the time,
while i wait for a spark,
that something,
that someone,
the thing everyone gains,
but everyone is not me,
you see when it drizzles,
it rains.

im shaking,
im anxious,
i need it right now,
that feeling,
that rush,
that knowing of how,
although im still cautious,
i prepare it with haste,
the fire, the inhale,
that feeling, that taste,
it hits me, i hate it,
i love it, its mine,
im faded, you see me,
im ****** up,
you're fine.

the wind it blows
it stops it goes,
you know its there,
it never  shows,
the winter cold,
it hails,
it snows,
its chilly,
its freezing,
im sneezing,
my nose,
knows that it is back,
the season that i love,
the things it brings,
seem one step above,
the seasons of heat,
the rain and the colours,
its the season for us,
its the season for lovers.

i wish that you could see me,
i wish i knew who you were,
i can almost see you,
but almost is just a blur,
the closer you get,
the harder it is,
to keep from this wishing,
to see through this mist,
i want it, i need it,
its all that i ask,
to find you, and hold you,
someday remove this mask,
of complexity and confusion,
of the lies and the deception,
but first i must answer,
but one simple question,
what is it i need,
and what are the things i want,
the difference between the two,
one is love, and ones a taunt.

I had a dream last night,
where I wrapped you in my arms,
I held on so tight,
that no one would ever bring you harm,
I kiss your lips,
you kiss me back,
nothing else is needed,
theres not one thing you lack,
at least not to me,
I'm simply just stunned,
and I just want you to see,
that it's you that I want,
hell you must know,
by now that it's true,
I'm deeply in love,
ive fallen for you.

you never really wanted,
you used just then left,
now that thing is shattered,
that broken thing in my chest,
some may say a heart,
but to me its just a hole,
no feeling, no warmth,
no fight, no glory.
it's ended, you've done it,
you finished our story,
so go on as is,
as if I was never there,
no need to worry,
it won't be hard,
you never cared,
you say you do,
but it's all just lies,
it's *******, unwanted,
unwinding ties,
the worst part about it,
is how you made me feel,
yes happy and safe,
but more importantly real,
i know you're scared,
cause as am I,
but what are you waiting for I found it,
the starlight in your eyes,
it's there I see it,
you just have to let it out,
you cant, your lost,
you're riddled with doubt,
no trust you say,
it cuts me deep,
im used to the pain,
I barely ever sleep,
kept up by you,
running laps in my mind,
you found my light,
but then you say it's just a bad time,
so now who needs it,
if your gone its your loss
at least that's what I tell myself,
when I'm mad that were lost,
that someday it will prosper,
it's not so easily just dropped,
but you broke it, it's bleeding,
you expect it to stop,
but dont be so foolish,
it's flowing,
**** every last drop,
what I wanted was real,
whether you know it or not,
your blushing, dont hide it,
I see you, your caught,
that smile, that grin, that look, that feel,
that "certain feeling" is love,
that "certain feeling" it's real,
I know you want to see,
so just open up your eyes,
I trust you,
so trust me,
no pain,
no lies,
all I wanted was to be happy,
and to have you in my life,
in reality were secret,
but in my dreams your my wife,
thats what makes it hardest,
the fact I see you every night,
and I'm not saying marry me
I'm just saying it feels right,
I would never try to hurt you,
I swear till my last breath,
I will love you forever,
I will love you until my death

I sit here and ponder,
it's so strange to me,
why, with you my mind wanders,
and of only you I dream,
maybe I'm misguided,
hell maybe I'm lost,
what will it take to have you,
il pay anything it cost,
and I'm not saying your a prize,
some silly thing to be bought,
I just want you to have it all,
every single thing I've got,
I give it to you freely,
you dont even have to ask,
but if you take it, you should know,
it comes with one simple task,
tell me those three words,
those eight reveling letters,
if you do this I can promise,
I will love you forever