I think back to when I was young,
To things I wish I'd never known,
I think back to innocence,
I remember, innocence,
I never did own.

It's a whisper of a thought,
A shadow of a dream,
Of a sin so great,
So real it seemed.

I was so young...
I would reach for the door,
And knew I was short,
I would puts sheets on boxes,
And call it a fort,
I would play tag at my school,
The fastest of my friends,
I would lay still in my bed,
Thinking this was the end.

She came into my room,
Not far into the night,
Took my blanket and my clothes,
Said it's alright,
Tonight,
I'll just explore,
Nothing more,
Don't cry,
Don't be a bore,
Don't be a child,
Be something more,
Maybe you'll understand,
When you're older,
When you're a man.

This, whisper of a thought,
This shadow of a memory,
It clouds me when I think,
Of how young I used to be,
To young to see the sin,
Or know where to begin,
When shame filled my soul,
I knew not how to win.

I can't explain away the scars,
The marks upon my skin,
Where she placed her hand,
And let her nails dig in.

Tell no one of my sin,
Speak nothing of this night,
Or I'll do this all again,
I knew that she was right,
So I kept my quiet of my pain,
And let her do her thing,
She said, you're lucky,
I don't wear rings.
And don't pout,
She said to me that night,
Then took her fingers out.

Mother was my lover
No one could ***** me
For she was first
Her darkest thirst
I could never quench
But how I tried
But I never lie
For she would punish me and my bad ways
She'd take away the sun, I'd live without days
And the night would speak to me
Quiet whispers, from a face I'd never see
Telling me evil deeds
Telling me evil greeds
(Planting that evil seed)

Mother was my lover
Not a hand by hers
Could touch my skin
No lips but hers
Could breathe such sin
But who am I to protest
I am but a guest
Under her roof provided
Her love and lust divided
Leaving me to her compulsive will
(Leaving me alone, to wish her ****)

Mother was my lover
Who I could only hate
Single digit age and *****
Never knowing the right from wrong
Never knowing how long,
The nights did last
In the heat and sweat
Where I be played victim
These nights I wish to forget
While her eyes, never see regret

Mother was my lover
I, she gave birth to
I, she made 'love' to
Always told it was for me to do
Diluted into believe this was true
But with an whispered doubt
I began to fall, without a shout
I would never land
Never fully understand
The way she placed her hand on me
The way her eyes would see and perceive
Her only child
Always calm and mild
But when the sun set, her demons woke
She'd take me, and I'd silently choke
Losing my grip on my mind
Leaving me empty and blind
(Searching out blood, I'd soon find)

Mother was my lover
She touched me soft, she hit me hard
Over time, she touched me into broken shards
I fought between, what I knew
And the their voices lewd
That spoke from a face never seen
That spoke with a voice so pristine
I could not help but listen, and obey
But what do I do, when it goes against,
What mother says...

Mother was my lover
Who never loved me at all
She picked me up to let me fall
And I could never stop
My quick decent
Until it stopped, she voice
That I resent
And I was told
Her words need air
With her hands unfair
If she couldn't breathe
Then her will would leave
And I wouldn't have to play anymore

Mother was my lover
Who I had to ****
Mother was the lover
Sporting evil will
I was told, by a voice I must obey
That I must take away all her days
I went into her room
Darkest of the night
And took away,
Her regretless sight
She woke wide-eyed
I spoke not a lie
And said it's time to die
Mother who I hate
She took the knife, deep into her chest
And I drank in all her blood
A taste I had to test.

I am the tool,
For which these fools play their many games,
To the winner will *** I the spoiled,
And for the losers a mind insane,
To pick away a flaking foundation,
To toss away the concept of creation,
In place put your sickly sin,
Then watch it grow and burst within.

You are my foot on steps I tread,
I lead to the edge you dread,
Tease you with a waking smile,
And push you fall, I fall, we're dead,
Never lie through these teeth again,
No sorry to stain the silken robe,
I am the lick you tasted then,
While I lick your ****** lobe,

A test for I'll have you hear,
My breath breathing in,
A thousand roaring steps have fell,
When you and I this walk begins,
A tempted thing this walk of ours,
To rot out the sky and kills the stars.

Let us fall into me,
I am all involved,
From the child that we began,
To the end that we evolved,
A beast and bargain,
A lie,
A cheat,
When love and sin come together,
When blood and *** did meet,
I've drank your every drop,
Not one fell into you,
Never know when to stop,
This thing I do is every true.(th)

Dear little one,
Know I'm here,
And I know you've won,
Even when your down,
Ever more when you're out,
Your name is on my lips,
Listen for it as I shout,
"I,
Am the luck and the wind,
To whisper your name,
Before you even begin,
After down and further,
You've been lain."

On my highest thoughts,
You're soaring,
My heart goes out,
A candle flame imploring,
It's in the air,
A question on the word,
What that you I saw,
Was it just a bird.

It's pain,
A rhythm in life,
Periodic,
Symbolically simple,
Subtle ripples,
Play on the cautious edge,
Tasting a colour in the eye,
Fair and foul this desperation,
I tightly held this lasting goodbye,
And I,
To no surprise,
Miss my baby gone,
In song,
And I,
Sigh.

Suppose there were birds in the form of death,
And they could hear you dream.
Imagine they could manipulate your mind,
Tease the senses,
And stir your livelihood so violently,
You question the concept of life itself.

Now in a state so abstract,
See yourself with wings,
With feathers and flight,
Now watch yourself fall,
Past the clouds,
The sun,
The stars,
The very earth itself.

Feel the wind whip past every cell,
Every pore,
Every hint of sweat,
Every salty trail of tears,
Every drop of spit,
Everything you've ever thought,
Feel it shake the bonds of synthesis,
And shatter them like your every hope and dream.

If you can muster,
See darkness with open eyes,
Watch life like water,
Boiling,
Evaporating,
Disappearing,
Ceasing to exist,
And put your face where others have lost theirs.

Now you have an inkling,
To the life of birds,
Of whom death is their flight.

Wrinkles in the folds,
In all the lies we've told,
Come out like the life of a wound,
Where in the withered gasp and swoon,
Falling forward on the trip,
Born of my moments slip,
That gave birth to death,
If only I held my breath,
And never spoke of the words I knew,
That broke the wound and made me true.

I'd be sin,
Still within,
Washed away at the end of the night,
I am witness to this thing you fight.

Wait for me here,
As love waits for life,
Wait for me here,
As the wind for a breath,
A breath from lips so sweet,
It could turn spring to winters meet,
Let it speak of whispers,
That tell of softer things,
The delicate shade of your eyes,
That could make the earth sing.

How you walk like wings take flight,
Effortless beauty in my sights,
No light could take from you,
How the moon is humbled too.

Wait for me,
Dear,
Wait for me,
Love,
As love waits for life,
And the wind for a breath,
So will I for you,
For you I wait till death.