My Promise to My Soldier
I promise to be there for you always
Whenever you need a helping hand
I promise to think about you daily
Wherever you are away
I promise to never let you down
No matter what we go through
I promise to keep you in my prayers
So that God may keep you safe
I promise to be here when you return
I will be there waiting
I promise to be your support
When you need it most
I promise to help you through the tough times
Even though it will hurt me
I promise to be here for you when you are in pain
Even though it will pain me too
I promise to support you in any decisions you may make
No matter what they are
I promise to be there for you when decisions need to be made
Even though it will **** me to watch you leave
I promise I will be there to say goodbye
When you leave
I promise to be there to say hello again
When you return home to me
I promise to love you forever and eternally
No matter what happens or where life takes us
I promise to be loyal to you while you are deployed
Because I know that you will be loyal to me
I promise that no matter where life takes me
It will never take me away from you
I promise to be here forever and always
Trustworthy and in love
Forever and always
I promise.

Oreos O so yummy
There so good in my tummy
You dip them in milk
You pull them apart
So much goodness
In one little munch
So go get me a bunch
I love my oreos
O so much
O so much
Some have peanut
And some have mint
There all so good
But double stuff is everyones favorite I bet

You cheated
I stayed
Your fine
I'm not
The pain is eating me away
You say it was a one time thing and that your sorry
You love me and it won't happen again
I say I love you and it's ok
But it really isn't
Once you do something wrong you lose my trust
Cheating isn't always physical
It hurts like hell no matter what kind it is
I want to trust you again
I want to be happy again
I want us again
Right now I don't have any emotions
I pretend I'm strong and I can handle it
But I can't
I try to pretend like it didn't happen and trust you again
But I can't
While I lay here at night I wonder what your doing
Are you texting her
Are you lying to me
Do you really love me
Do you really want to talk to me because it doesn't seem like it
I'm sick of being the only one trying in this relationship
Man up and tell me what you really want
Maybe my friends are right I'm to nice to everyone. I get walked all over on
But I'm done  with that

The love we share is so incredible
It is unlike anything else
The love we share is special
It is so unique in so many ways
Staring into each others eyes so peacefully
We can read each other like a book
Our soft tender bodies touching
No words come out of our mouths
Our eyes tell it all
Our lips touching gently
It is so incredible and beautiful
The way we love
Nothing can compare to it
When we are together we block out the world
No one matters beside you and I
Two people but one heart that will last a lifetime

M.W.W <3

Lets make love like its the very first time
Come closer and let me show you, what’s on my mind

As I wrap my arms around you and squeeze you tight
I feel the butterflies in my stomach deep in flight

I can feel your body shiver at my mere touch
As your breathing becomes heavy and very rough
Relax cause as long as im here you have nothing to fear

The warmth of your breath
As you whisper in my ear,
Sends chills down my spine
As you say I love you

Slowly kissing my lips,
Down to my neck
My body becomes paralyzed
As if I just wrecked.
Our body's sweats wetness of love
Its like fog fills the room from ceiling to rug

The smell of love essence fills the air
If anyone’s hear's us I don’t even care

I love the motion when our two bodies connect
If we had to vote a moment to keep, this is the one I elect

You rub my back so gracious and slow
Don’t hold back just let it flow

I love you so much
Our body's begin to shiver so its almost over

My heart is racing faster than the speed of light
Baby lets take a break so we can start all over

We don’t have to rush cause there’s no where to go

Your words in whispers excite my heart
Fill my mind with passion unexplored
Your soft lips ****** as they linger where pressed
My body now longing, begging for more
The touch of your hands as they wander
Sends chills racing deep within
The heat of your body close so close to mine
Is sweet pleasure indulging my skin
Desires overwhelm me, yet I cant get enough
I crave everything that is you
I get lost in your eyes, and am swept away
By each sultry, hypnotizing move.

Hurt, Hurt is what I am
Wait know
Hurt is  
Harm
Damage
Wounded
Pain
I'm way more then hurt
Hurt is only one word
I'm confused,scared and embarrassed
People say I'm such a bad girlfriend
That he can do better
That I treat him like ****
But no that's not the case if I did he would tell me
He tells me all the time I'm the most amazing girlfriend
But
I don't know what I wan't
I should be happy I have such a perfect life
But i'm not
I'm scared
Because I feel like i'm losing everyone
I'm scared to make a wrong decision
One minute I want one thing and the next I want another
I don't know what I want
Today my mother said for the first time
oh is that my son in law on the phone
I nearly died inside a part of me was happy and another part didn't know
Yes I love him and want to be with him for the rest of my life
But I don't know yet
I don't know if i'm quite ready to settle down just yet
And is it wrong to still have feelings for your best friend... Idk I'm just confused

She might seem strong from the inside out
She might be the girl everyone thinks is perfect
But that girl is far from it
Shes been through so much
From the time she was born to the day she turned 17
Shes the girl who has scars
People may say oh its just stupid boys
get over it
But that's not it, that's not it at all
Yes she has been hurt from boys
Shes been cheated on, lied too and so much more
But that's not what hurts
It's so much more then that
She doesn't know her dad he left
He left before she was even born
Yeah that's not a big deal I know what your thinking
But it is a big deal
Yes she has her step dad that treats her better then she can imagine
And a mother thats been there through thick and thin
But sometimes that girl wonders who her dad is
It's hurts
Shes been sick since she was 1
Almost died in a hospital bed many times, with her mom by her side
She lost all her great grandparents in 1 short year
And her mom has diabetes and isn't doing so well
She sits in her bed and cries at night
She wonders what she did to deserve this
She hurts
She might seem strong, but she breaks
but yet she still finds a reason to put a smile on her face

I'm tired of feeling all this pain, I feel so num
I wan't to go back to when I was young
To the time where nothing matter
No worrying, No jealousy, No guys
Just friends
I wan't to go back to the time where depression didn't exit
instead of cutting wrists
we cut paper snowflakes
The time where boys had cooties not hormones
The time where all I wanted was to be a princess
The time where I cried over broken crayons not over boys
The time where *** didn't matter
It's so different now
instead of looking like a princess, you have to look like barbie
And guys expectation are just so high
And even if they say we are perfect
we aren't
because it's the same thing ever day
they still look at the naked chicks on the front of those playboys  
It's so painful
Now I wait to get hurt
I'm just expecting it
It's an every day thing
Worrying that another girl will take my place
You say that they are just friends
But you use to like them at one point so it's not that simple
I'm a girl my mind over thinks
I've been hurt so many times by you and other guys
I just don't trust anymore
You've lied to me
once you lie you lose all my trust
now I'm laying here while my mascara runs.

I'M SORRY

I'm sorry..
If I'm not skinny enough for you to see my ribs.
I'm sorry..
If I'm not pretty enough to be "Your Girl."
I'm sorry..
If I'm not tan enough for you.
I'm sorry..
I'm not a ******* model so I don't act like a **** star for you.
I'm sorry..
If i don't have a dream body that turns you on.
I'm sorry..
I won't drop down to my knees to get you to like me
I'm sorry...
If my ***** aren't big enough
I'm sorry..
If my hair is not long enough.
I'm sorry..
If I'm not the "Hottest" girl you have ever seen.
I'm sorry you have to look at half naked girls because I'm not good enough
But most of all...
I'm sorry that most guys can't accept a girl for who they really are.
They always say be yourself, but when we are ourselves we aren't good enough...
How hard is it to be loyal to one girl...

I'm not mad
The truth is I'm hurt
Hurt more then you will ever know
You think I'm fine brushing off all that we ever had.
You think I'm lying in bed with a smile on my face
Dreaming about my life with him
Some nights yes
Other nights
That's not the case
I lye here with a million things going through my mind
What if I wouldn't of gone
What if I wouldn't of been so pushy
What if non of my flaws would be flaws to you
What if
Then I remember no the only what if is the
What if you changed
What if you grew up and understood what I wanted
Theirs only so many chances you can give someone
Like I said I'm not mad I'm hurt
I know I hurt you too but the hurt I felt
The tears going down my face when you compared me to my best friend and told her all my flaws
I felt like i was never good enough after that
I'm sorry you thought you had to act different to impress me
I'm sorry that I'm bad at showing how I feel
I'm sorry I write these poems and I don't  like looking at the past
I'm sorry I was controlling
The truth is you never had to act different to empress me I was there for you from the start
I was your best friend from the start
I loved you from the start
The truth is I wanted you to show me how you really felt
You kept it all hidden so you wouldn't hurt me
But I felt like I couldn't tell you how I felt because you couldn't tell me how you felt
The truth is I write poetry because it's the only way to really express how I feel and it keeps me from cutting
bet you never knew that
The truth is I do look back at the past every **** day and it hurts like hell
The truth is I was pushy because I wanted the best for you
Best for us
Now I'm sitting here crying while writing this
I didn't hurt you because I wanted to
I made a decision for myself for once
I'm not mad at you
I'm sorry if your mad at me
I'm sorry everything has to end like this
I miss you
I love you
Always have and always will
Now I'm happy for the most part
All I'm missing is my best friend
Maybe one day I will get him back

M.W.T.W

She lies in her bed alone in the dark
Naked
Physically and mentally
Her warm body under the blankets wishing he was here
She misses his warm kiss
His touch
The way he looked at her and made everything better
Now he's 1,039 miles away
He's just a dream
Everything is just a dream
Except one thing the rain
The rain is how she feels
The rain is her tears
She just can't wait to get that first kiss again
It will feel like the first time again
The first kiss
The first touch
The first time she jumped into his arms
It will all happen again
She can't wait to hear baby i'm home after those long 5 months of him being gone
She will wait for him
People doubt her but she will prove them wrong
She's in love is that so hard to believe

This hurt you
It hurt me too
All I know is i miss you

You were there for so long
How could you ever leave?
I thought you had another year
Waiting up your sleeve .

The day that you left
Was the saddest of my life
Sitting in my room all alone
Looking at photos of you and I

It might be selfish
But I wish you were here
Even if you stuck around
For one more year

My strength
From you
So i'm just trying to be strong
Just for you

I'm not perfect
No one is
I just hope you're up there
And that you're proud of me

Even though you were holding on for so long
You had to let go
But there's not a day I don't think of you

I just want to tell you
That your always in my heart
Even though I still cry
We are not apart

Everyone has a bestfriend
Well i have a special best friend
Our relationship is not like any other
Ours is more then words can describe
5 years ago we met
And we are still going strong with our friendship
We never thought we would be where we are today
He's been there for me through everything
Our bond is special
We have no secrets
No lies
Nothing at all to hide
I trust him with my life
He doesn't just look at me as his best friend
I'm also his crush
Have been for 5 years
At first I was just like oh its just a crush
But no its more then that i realized these past 5 years that
He loves me more then anyone could love someone
He's shown that in so many ways and I would just push him away
It's going to be going on 6 years and i'm just now realizing there might be more with us
Something even more special then I already thought we had
So if you have a best friend never let them go because you need someone special like them in your life

I love you, you love me
But maybe we arnt men't to be
But maybe we are
We fight and scream
We always try to make things better
We say things will change but they never do
I'm scared
I'm scared of losing you
Your leaving in one month
for five months
Five Months will seem like a life time
What will happen in those five months
Will you change?
Will I change?
I'm scared
People don't see how much I love you
They always ask why I don't stop
Stop myself from hurting and just throw away the  pain
Then I look at them and say I'm a girlfriend
Of A Military Man i'm strong I can handle this
I can handle anything
But yet when i'm alone I doubt myself
Will I be able to handle these five months?
No matter how much i'm hurting
I'm not ready to say that last goodbye and let go
I love him

She's over this place
She's over these trees
She's over being in this small town
She's over you
And most of all she's over everyone
She wants to start new
She wants new friends
A new life
New town
She wants to just be with the one she loves
She wants to forget about the past thats all
Is that so hard?
I guess so
She wants a new life
Everything here reminds her of the past
Maine
So much has happened here
Tears,heartbreaks,deaths and so on
She just wan't to get out of this hell hole she calls home.

It took one day to fall for you
One day in your arms
I thought I had you
You said you loved me
But I guess you lied
your pushing me away
I'm breaking a little more each day
I wish you would come back to me
But you don't seem to care
So let me say goodbye for now

Have you ever had a cry where it feels like your chest is cracking?
Where you feel the tears running down your face.
Where you can't cry out because your breath is knocked out of you due to the pain in your chest.
Where you squeeze your eyes tightly closed it almost hurts.
And finally you let out that curling sob.
Over and over again.
As if it would go on forever.
And you can't stop yourself.
Have you ever felt this?
Because it's on my list of worst possible experiences that I am having....

Where do I start
or should I say what do I do.
I use to be able to write my words so easy,
they came out like nothing.

No thinking,
Just writing,
My thinking was the reason why I wrote,
And why everything was so easy to put into words.

I didn't have to think to put my feelings into words.
My writing is what made me stop for a second,

Just for a second,

And let my hand do the work on how I was feeling.

Word by word
Poem by poem
my feelings were so easily out of my head
And on the paper.

Now I lay here,
I'm thinking about my feelings,
I'm thinking about how I put those feelings on paper

My head hurts
So much thinking,
And so much ****** writing.
I miss when it all just came out so easily
Now where do I start...

The Good times, the bad times
And all the other ****** times in between
5 years together
Strong as ever
From dating
To marriage
To having a baby
We’ve made it through
The Cheating
The Lying
The trust issues
The ex
We seem to get through it all
Sometimes I can’t believe it
I can’t believe I’ve put up with all this ****
But we are better people today
But...
One thing that seems to get in the middle
I’m tired of putting up with
We always fight about it
Is your father
He hates me and well I hate him
He’s a *******
He’s a pig
He doesn’t know how to treat women
He’s hated me from day one
And that’s ok
What is not ok is not having a husband that doesn’t stick up for you
Always makes up excuses for his father
It hurts
It really does
He treats me different
Different then your brothers girlfriends
It’s sad
It really is
when your brother sticks up for me
But my own husband can’t
I sit in my car most mornings
And just cry
Because that’s all I can do is cry
I can’t talk because we fight
So I cry
And I honestly don’t know how much longer I can do this...

Sorry for how sucky this is I haven’t wrote in a while just needed to get my feelings out...

Are you thinking of another
While you're lying here with me
Is your mind out there cheating
wishing it were free
free to love another
while we lay here once again
Your body is here with me
But, your mind, it is some where else

Are you laying in bed when I’m not home
Fantasizing and searching for what you don’t have
because I’m not giving you enough
I’m not you’re fantasy
But really what is enough now a days
Tell me please
Because I try
sometimes  i even push myself
Push myself to do stuff
To make you happy
But I see it
I know I've lost you
Theirs no passion anymore

I’m not happy because I know you’re not happy
You’re in you’re own world
Searching for what you don’t have
I’m not good enough
Maybe i was never good enough
We are right back at square one
Why did we waste all this time
We have a child now
This is all just really sad

Why are you still holding on
If I’m not giving you what you want
Why are you hiding what you’re hiding
When I’m not home
What are you searching
Just stop lying
It doesn’t have to be physical
It all just hurts the same
Because
while we lay here once again
Your body is here with me
But, your mind, it is some where else