We, the children of a system that awards you simple papers
That state 'he/she has achieved what we deem quality'
As we are all judged and graded in exactly the same way
Because they promote individuality unless it's intelligence

'We all learn differently, and at different paces'
Is an often preached sermon of our progenitors these days
Yet I know more about synonyms for ancestry and parents
Than how to survive once our papers begin to mean nothing

So here I'd like you to tell me what is considered knowledge
And I'd ask of the older generations to insert customary wisdom
Because more adults have spat quotes to me like gospel
Than tought me what I really need to know and value

I've got a track record spanning back almost two decades
Of being sorry for just being myself at all times
So I think my teachers should be proud of themselves
To know that the things they preach to me really get through

You see, homework and exams mean almost nothing
To those who need to really think on their feet
Because this same system idolizes the memory
Mistaking it for a wealth of rawest knowledge

So I love it when they say school is too easy on kids now
Rewarding losing and not promoting any ambition
Because I've been berated for attaining success at any level
Due to grades that define me not successful enough

I think that between
The sweatshirt that still smells like you
And still owns a few of your hairs
Those birthday cards you made me on your own
And that story you wrote me as a Christmas gift
But I threw away later
If only out of sadness
Or the memories of the photo
Of you I snuck In the spring of grade ten
But you made me delete right away
Because you had that awful uneven tan
Do you think of when you sat in the cold to wait
Even though I thought you were never coming
Let alone early
And we held hands at school once
Without you making a fuss
You stayed up until two in the morning to talk me down
because I did the same for you so much
I also have a note you wrote me once upon a time
And I have a letter I recently wrote for you
But was too afraid to send
And I guess a line out of it sums up perfectly
The question that's been on my mind
If you keep anything from our friendship
Are they more like souvenirs or a prize?

Now you make me feel like talking things out is pointless, and
You proceed to rip away any emotion that I might have
Maybe you like to think that it's meant to be for you, but
I simply can't stand the way you take and give nothing back
And that couldn't be the worst of it
Now, you see, you aren't even here to begin with
You're taking myself away from inside of my head
Your verbal abuse is causing a special type of sickness
And it's probably cliche, but by now I'm so sick of it
But that's still only a fraction of it
Because on top of your voice I hear the others
Not always inside my head, but mostly just in general
The jostling and racket of daily life can keep me rattled
Those same voices push in on me, until I can no longer breathe
Even then, when I manage to breathe
It's only so that I can justify my erratic thoughts and motions
I'm so sorry that I cry and that I run away from situations
And when I say nothing, I'm screaming quietly out of politeness
All in all, I'm holding in my condition so I'm not treated different
Because these days, stigmas breed
And usually, it's out of misinformation or lack of it in general
This lack of awareness by loved ones always seems to upset me
Because I'm taking myself away from inside of my head
And most of you will never know what anxiety really is