I fall asleep and wake at the shores on the lake of fire
Walking the molten beach I come across an empty shell
Putting it to my ear there is a familiar sound
The sweet voice of a woman lost
She’s laughing as she always did
I give in and laugh with her as I always had

BANG
The sound of waves is replaced with hellfire
The screams of my beloved tear through my soul
I try and throw the shell into the lake
A large claw is released and grabs my ear
Pulls itself back into place
Forces me to endure the memory

Pulling my knife I take my ear
Crush the shell under my boot
I look up to find an army of shells in the distance
Their closing in fast from all angles but one
All but from the lake behind me
The fire grows as if it knows I’m coming
I run to the edge and stop

I’m pushed back into reality just before they reach me
My breath is heavy
Cold sweat runs down my brow
I reach for the bottle and douse my liver in whiskey
This time I won’t dream

New bottle
new woman
same fight
same old night
demons back
need distraction
grab my jacket
look for action

any kind
any order
fill my mind with drugs and daughters
drinks and fights
ill soon get right
but this bottle aint finished
and its not yet midnight

where this night goes
no one knows
kiss the girl
throw them bows
finish whiskey
find way home
sleep comes easy
when your so tipsy

rise early
to repent
cant find words
still on the fence
good or bad
misunderstood
alls forgotten
when she grips wood

go to work
live my life
give no hint
of dark inside
or sleepless night
and drunken frights
through all the pain
i smile bright

good girl
cant deny
soft and sweet but tough inside
she breaks down walls
i stand and fight
told her stay away
from men of my kind

clocked out
call whitney
up to no good
shes right there with me
hit the green
until im purple
another day
restart the circle

New bottle
new woman
same fight
same old night
demons back
need distraction
grab my jacket
look for action...

I am the pebble that fells giants
a peasant that cant be bought
the jewels I seek don't shine
building or taking all that i need

I am the shepard in the storm
a warrior that just wont stay down
the pain i take is for those I love
laughing as death sees me and blinks

I am the oak that stands the test of time
a thorn in the side of empires
the blow I deliver will root itself in history
forcing the world to remember my name

He was wildfire in a forest
fought every day for burning too brightly
smoke rose in the sky wherever he walked
serving as a constant reminder of past recklessness

she remained soft in a world made of stone
fought every day for reflecting cowardice
covering scars and bruises with callouses and clothing
growing a little more cold with each passing day

they met by chance
were left forever changed
he gave her warmth
saw strength in her peace
she taught him control
gave his passion direction

Why am I always so optimistic about the future? Truth is I've always been drawn to negative things. Anything people would normally avoid I'd find myself running towards. At first it was probably my natural distrust of people. How could I put stock in their opinions as they tell me how bad my choices have been and when I look a little closer all I can see is them being even more ****** up than I am.

At least I'm honest about it. The way I see things, there cant be any room to grow if your always hiding behind some pristine illusion. Don't get me wrong, I'm not claiming perfection or anything but I am striving for it and that has to count for something. Admittedly, my sins may be greater than the average but, I've always maintained a strict code and not once have I crossed it.

I get it though, its easier to judge someone for who they were than to take their measure every time you see them. Especially when that person doesn't hide from their past. Just understand it's not apathy that you see but acceptance. It was all of those bad decisions that led me to do all of the good that I've accomplished. It was a reaction. The pendulum swung so far in the wrong direction that when it changed course it had enough momentum to push me even farther in the right one.

So, I guess what I'm really trying to say is yea, I do have faith in a better tomorrow and of course I believe that a person can change. I have to.

A cog in my system has gone missing
Many times others have sought to replace it
It would always end the same
With me walking away into the sunset
the ashes of her life in my wake

My intentions were nothing but good
And for a moment I was soaring again
Usually this only lasts the length of a night
Or however long she can tolerate my *******
before the realization hits That the void cant be filled

It kills me to watch them weep as they walk through the door
I say nothing and let them hate me
To keep them where they cant shine would be a crueler fate
I sit at the back of my favorite bar and drink to their names

I Think back to how I cherished them for different reasons
A shy laugh
A secret
A pair of soft lips and the way shed kiss me

But in the end
Some didn't quite fit
Others matched perfectly but our speeds just wouldn't align
All deserve more than what I have to give

Watch out for the strong willed
for conviction will inspire
yet uncompromising in nature
it will **** you when he lets you down

watch out for the tender hearted
for ideals are infectious
yet impossible to live up to
it will **** you to see her hate you

watch out for the one you love
for their influence will alter your path
yet in the end you'll want to change
and be born a better man

Hell bent on destruction
He hits the road alone
Nothing attached to hold him back
Just a sin filled past to atone

liquor is strong on his breath
Hair of the dog on his wounds
Fiery eyes reveal darkness inside
he'll carry that weight to his doom

Most days hes feeling better
but tonight hes doing worse
when verse wont work he starts the search
to escape the ceaseless thirst

When the night is over
bridges burning in his wake
he steps right over ashes
and think of the coals hell rake

on the hunt for good distractions
He knows just where to knock
In the next fight or a new love
Just another chaos

My sanity is high maintenance
With each day that passes it asks more of me
There are times I question its necessity
Wonder if its the source of my strife
Monotony
Self destruction

I purge myself of these thoughts with feminine distractions
If none are available I drown out the wailing with whiskey
Its a good time for awhile
Lots of laughing
Crying
*******

The hunger finds me when the last person leaves the room
A sure sign that the cycle has started anew
Maybe this time it'll be different
But no matter how much is fed the emptiness expands
Fights
Takes over

Once its drained me of all life
Its time to do something stupid
Kick start some trouble
Any I can find
So I leap without looking
Then deal with the consequences later
After
Never

Normal night
New woman
Same bottle of whiskey

Everything seemed to be going so well
Of course that's usually when I **** up
She professes her hate and slams the door
Good thing ol jack doesn't have legs

****...
The bottle reaches its end
Those Demons notice the coast is clear
My old friends closing in from their corners
Shrinking my spirit the closer they get

My backs hit this wall too many times
I think I've finally had enough
There is nothing left to lose
Fatigue replaces fear
An intense calm washes over me

It has become clear what I must do
A direct charge into impossible odds
With only two acceptable outcomes
Victory or death

And so I run
Spirit growing immensely with every step
This time it is the demons that shrink
Screaming and Retreating to their caves

I don't give chase
Its not possible to abolish them
they are a part of me
The young idealist cannot return
He died long ago

Here lies a coward where a man now stands
His soul bloodied from the hell hes escaped
The scars serve as a reminder of the battle once had
His spirit ever ready for the demons return

peering into his eyes I can sense a familiar spirit
this man also lives for the thrill of testing his limits
of pushing himself just to the edge of life
leaning over to get a look at the other side
and at the last possible moment
escaping on the slimmest of chances

I wonder if this is the man to defeat me
I hope he's prepared to go all the way
that's the only way you leave a fight like this
when your opponents heart stops beating

An electric shock runs down my spine
it spreads and stuns my muscles
the air is so incredibly thin now
This is the moment I live for
when you overcome all fear
let go of the illusion of control
and ride that powerful wave into ultimate victory

Its the hottest night of summer
they say record breaking highs
run down joint filled up
and not one of us dry

playin hard blues electric
got us all in a trance
this band cant be stopped
not a choice but to dance

now thats when i saw her
fine *** lisa brown
if the band cast a spell
then she channeled that sound

and if you aint heard
shes a legend round town
once broke a mans neck
just walkin around

calling me over
as the bass picks up pace
a squint and a smile
without thought i give chase

eyes trained on my prize
on the hunt like a hound
better stay out my way
or ill run yo *** down

just when i reach her
aint no time for words
she takes my hand
and shows off her curves

her hips sway freely
to the bands slow soul
losing my mind in her grind
i tell her lets go

we open the door
and there stands her man
badge on his chest
and a bat in his hand

boys at his back
too many to fight
but he calls her a *****
so i send him my right

blood from my mouth
and a bruise on my core
i reach in my pocket
and pull my shiny.44

With a shot in the air
the whole bar panics
we make our escape
and speed off in my caddy

in the morning they caught me
spent a few years in jail
all those letters from lisa
helped me survive in that hell

sometimes people ask me
"was she worth all that time?"
I just look em in the eye and say
"EVERY MOTHA ****** NIGHT!"

you asked why i'm still around
when your so obviously broken
most men would be sprinting
after seeing you so un-made up

truth is they were weak
where they saw damage
I saw strength
cant recognize it if you lack it

I knew the real you the day we met
felt your edges and never looked back
we don't have to fix each other
we fit together

in the end I love you because i know
that anyone who smiles so brightly
can only have lived in the darkness
and that's beautiful

I want to feel
Something
Anything
Here I go again
Screaming to the top of my lungs
Punching the ceiling of my car

I need to feel
Someone
Anyone
More shots
Grinding to the DJ's rhythm
Returning fists to my drunken opponent

I will feel
Somehow
Any way
another hit
Acting without consequence
Fighting the status quo

Gripping my jacket in winter winds
Quickly working past empty streets
Not a strange sight at this hour
Still after what I've done it's for the best
No Witnesses to watch me skip town

Turning down an alley snow melts into slush
Replaying the night over and over in my mind
The deeper I go the warmer it gets
Sweat drips from my brow and stings my eyes
Purging my mind of sinful memories

Ditching the jacket and picking up pace
Red and blue hues flash between the buildings
What I've done is inexcusable
Its too late to look back and if they catch me
no surrender

The heat has become unbearable
I pull my shirt over head to take it off
Regaining sight I see a beast matted black
Blowing a foul odor through snarling fangs
With Bright red eyes piercing my soul

We're on death ground now
wailing sirens bounce off the alley walls
I have no questions but many regrets
This beast has come to drag me to hell
And all that's left is to fight

I stand before you today with a heavy heart
With arteries weighed down by sinful choices
Cant lie and say I didn't enjoy them at the time
but now that i face the consequences
I wonder if it was all worth it

she was pretty and damaged and I the drunken fool
with that combination nothing good can happen
cant lie and say I didnt love her
but now that i look back at all that we've destroyed
I wonder if it was all worth it

he was hers and went looking to find me
its not in me to run so now im staring down a barrell
cant lie and say im not afraid
but now that ive looked into his hateful eyes i know
a woman like that.. shes worth it

I am the lion
Roaming my jungle I do not step quietly
Panic.. Scatter at the sound of my footsteps
Know that if you wander these lands
All things in fangs reach belong to me

If you doubt me come and take this life
Make the choice and change your fate
give all you have and don't hold back
This jungle will not let you run

At first sight I will do my worst
Defiant eyes mean nothing in this game
One weak move and know that your mine
I am god with his spirit inflamed
A battle well fought death guides me now
Tonight we feast in your name

I dream of the beast to defeat me
That fear is my driving force
Hes on his way and I just cant wait
To find the limit in my final course

Life here is not for the weak
Either **** to eat or be food
I'm ready to die at any **** time
Show me right now
Are you?

When I was a boy I envied the wolf
To roam freely in the forest
and run with a pack at my side

When I was a boy I envied the wolf
thrill of the hunt on my mind
fighting til death one and for all
no one left behind

When I was a boy I envied the wolf
until I crossed the line
and learned too late the price to be untamed

When I became a man I put envy away
for the truth was no longer blurred
predator and prey both suffer the same
and now I stand the shepherd

I will ask that you move fast with me
that you follow my lead

I will ask that you free yourself
and forget all but the moment

I will ask that If only for a night
hold nothing back

I will not shine a light on dark moments
those moments are ours alone

I will not expose secrets you've shared
they are not mine to give

I will not judge you
I don't have the right.

It's late
crazy night
still drunk
laying in bed
staring at the spinning ceiling
If only she were here..
Anyway

better get to sleep
works in a few hours
shouldn't have gotten tacos
they were so good though
and i never get to see my boys now
god that was fun
remember last time we double dated
stayed up all night over looking the city
moving on

I should call off
rents due soon
i spent too much money last night
why did i keep buying shots
who's idea was it to take shots?
Its Wednesday!
she would have talked some sense into me
always was the responsible one
gave balance to my *******

Im gonna text her
tell her how great she was
she needs to know right now
and then well get coffee after work
this is perfect
I have the best drunk ideas
what could go wrong

Do you know why I got so mad that night. I was an hour away with my family and in that moment, you had me. You had me in a place that I told myself I would never end up again, and there I was standing in that insanity once more.

Story of my life really. She calls and I come running. Just like clockwork. You called that night, and I ran. But no signs of a wolf when I got there. Just a girl claiming she wanted to see me. How could I be mad at that? Easily when I consider what was left to save you from boredom. Hardly at all, when I remember how you saved me from drowning just days before.

I didn't mean to lead you on. Its just that we found ourselves in the same place that night, and when the bourbon wasn't enough anymore we found comfort in each others arms. Together we forged a life raft. For awhile kept each other alive as we drifted in sorrow on a sea of hard liquor. I thought we found the shore together but maybe land didn't agree with your legs or it was the wrong island altogether.

Either way I Like it here, and i'm trying to make it work. So in the future if your bored call someone else. If you need a good distraction, find it anywhere else. If you do find yourself in trouble and no one else picks up. Dial my line, you know ill be running.

Do you know why I was upset with you that night. I was an hour away with my family and in that moment, you had me. You had me in a place that I told myself I would never end up again, and there I was standing in that insanity once more.

Story of my life really. She calls and I come running. Just like clockwork. You called that night, and I ran. But no signs of a wolf when I got there. Just a girl claiming she wanted to see me.

How could I be mad at that? Easily when I consider what was left to save you from boredom. Hardly at all, when I remember how you saved me from drowning just days before.

I didn't mean to lead you on. Its just that we found ourselves in the same place that night, and when the bourbon wasn't enough anymore we found comfort in each others arms.

Together we forged a life raft. For awhile kept each other alive as we drifted in sorrow on a sea of hard liquor. I thought we found the shore together but maybe land didn't agree with your legs or maybe it was the wrong island altogether.

Either way I Like it here, and i'm trying to make it work. So in the future if your bored call someone else. If you need a good distraction, find it anywhere else. If you do find yourself in trouble and no one else picks up. Dial my line, you know ill be running.

I'm sorry if my being so forward made you uncomfortable But, I don't take it back. I meant it. Truth is I think we've played at this game long enough. From day one I've made it very clear that I'm into you. You've always carelessly laughed it off. If you'd continued to do so I'd know I've missed my mark. Instead you now fight with such ferocity. Showing that spirit I love so much. Reflecting your true feelings by accident.

I know we work together and your situation is complicated. None of that matters to me. Yea, it may be awkward for some people. The way I see things, that's none of our business and they can deal with it on their own. Don't be surprised. While our electric stare's and hours of parking lot conversations have been incredible. I'm coming for more. If you know one thing about me its that I don't play games and I **** sure don't ride the fence. So, if i'm wrong when I kiss you right now you can slap me or leave and never speak to me again. Whatever you want; right now you can have it.

Stagnation is the true death
Waiting and watching
Suffering silently
Slowly decaying
To do nothing is to be nothing

Cowardice is the lowest form of life
Wishing Without reaching
Angry frightened and confused
Ever uncertain
There is no honor without perseverance

Roaring is the only option
Laughing as you stalk death
Fully aware of the moment
Crashing the limits
Making your voice ring throughout the centuries

stagnation is the true death
silently waiting and watching
slowly decaying
to do nothing is to be nothing

cowardice is the lowest form of life
wishing without reaching
just as bravery cannot exist without fear
there is no honor without perseverance

take risks
make mistakes
laugh as you stalk death
watch as uncharted waters become familiar territory
realize strength is forged in vulnerability

find out what your fighting for
let that love abolish doubt from your mind
suffer greatly just to let it prosper
know that all pain has an expiration date
Let it harden you and be better tomorrow

roaring is the only option
wake up and earn your existence
battle every day to preserve it
crash all limits placed before you
make your voice ring throughout the centuries

Run little wolf, do not be afraid
this world belongs to who
pay the price to remain untamed

if you get lost, do not be ashamed
push on and keep your north true
run little wolf, do not be afraid

as hunger strikes, remember the game
the weak will always be food
pay the price to remain untamed

howl out loud until your voice fades
watch as your pack comes to
run little wolf, do not be afraid

no matter the threat don't stay in the shade
stand and face it no matter how few
pay the price to remain untamed

when death draws near, never pass blame
he comes for us all and your time is due
run little wolf, do not be afraid
pay the price to remain untamed

I may not be the strongest
but I always persevere
and I will never back down

I may not be the fastest
but I always finish
and I will never give in

I may not be the richest
but I always provide
and I will never be bought

I may not be fearless
but I always survive
and I will never cower

I may not make the smart play
but I always make the right one
and I will never change

Sleep dont come easy
when your heart is heavy
when the bars form around you
from the things that you've done
the people you've hurt

There is no escape
from the pain you've felt
when the screams belt
gotta find a distraction

I need a strong drink
to numb this feeling
I need a hard fight
to get the punishment i deserve
i need a good woman
to help me forget

no longer can i live this way
running no longer suits me
im done with forked tongues
forged from my subconscious

its time to dance with the devil
no need to wait in line
this is hell and im on the list
a very special guest
they've been expecting me for some time

she is the cool breeze on a summer day
caressing my wings with each rising ******
suspended in heaven I let myself fall
and for a moment I am soaring again

Storms coming
Wouldn't know it if you looked outside
The day was was warm and clear
Men out washing cars and kids running
The old man steps onto his porch

That was the signal
Close up shop and take shelter
Hold your loved ones tightly until its over
He never said how or much at all really
But he always knew

A gentle breeze kicks in with a light drizzle
The streets clear as the day once was
Most people hide safely in thier basements
The old man slowly lights a cigar
Calmly waiting and watching

Mothers hold their children with flashlights
Sirens fearsomly wail in the distance
Reporters unconvincingly warn not to panic
Its too late to run so prepare for the worst
An act of gods will has come

The sky rips open with cracks and flashes
Rain freezes over and slams the rooftops
Unfettered by threats he blows smoke in the air
Staring the storm in its eye
Challenging.. begging it to bring its best

Sharp winds tug at his clothing
Sign posts electrify as bolts scatter
Ever vigilant he gives not an inch
Trees fall and crash into houses
This man is devoid of all sense

The storm passes after hours of terror
People pour out to tally the damage
The old man sits in his chair
I ask him "do you ever get afraid?"
He put out his cigar and looked at me
Of course son, that's the only way to be brave

10

Hes fast.. that uppercut came out nowhere. its always the one you don't see that takes you down

9

Not sure how many more of those I can take. My legs feel like jelly

8

My right eye's bleeding pretty bad, hes been working on it all night and im pretty sure i have a cracked rib

7

This cant be happening man, not in front my family. I can't go out like this

6

This is a b.s. match anyway. There's two of him for christ sake!. and why do we need two referees!

5

If only I would have trained harder. Stopped drinking and taken thing's seriously for once. Come on lady luck I need you now more than ever!

4

How am I gonna face my girl after this. She's always been in my corner and i'm about to let her down

3

Well at least its almost over. I'll find a bottle of whiskey and hide out for a while.

2

**** that. You've fought harder men than him and you've always come out on top. Get your *** up and put him down. The loser is the man that gives up. That's something you've never done once. And your not gonna start today!

1

Life is dull
Days drag on like a rocket in the sky
A trail of smoke left behind as a reminder of its linear trajectory

Life is thrilling
Picking up speed as it approaches the intended target
Exploding on impact with a brilliant display of fire

Life is over
Nothing remains but charred debris scattered and unrecognizable
Another rocket is fired into the sky

Breath deep
You've walked a long road
Fought many battles
Put it all on the line
Gained everything
Subsequently lost it all

Nothing to lose now
Nowhere to turn back to
Regrets are worthless
Look ahead and forget

Sit for a moment and observe
Take in all the beauty around you
You will not be passing this way again

Its time
Sprint towards the mouth of hell and dive in
Look into the devils eyes and don't flinch
Take everything you've got
Hit that ******* in the mouth

I've been driving down this road for too long
It's too dark outside to see just how far it stretches
the tape in my deck played both sides
Now there is only the sounds of the road and my motor

Delving deeper into the dark countryside the panic begins
Trapped in the vehicle it's getting harder to breath
I roll down the windows and it creates a vacuum
now holding my breath I slam on the brakes

I jump out of my car and sprint into the empty space
Deep into the night I run until my lungs fill with fresh air
Headlights in the distance behind me begin to fade
When the battery dies I won't know which way is forward

Falling into the cold dirt I stare into the nights sky
The only visible light is millions of light years away
Drifting in and out of conciousness i wonder how to reach it
This continues for hours
Rest never comes

Suddenly I hear the rumbling of tires
Then a vibration in the road
Headlights in the distance shine brightly
I head towards it sprinting and screaming

The large truck pulls over
The stout driver lets me in
We talk about good food and women and life
He drops me off at my car and jump starts it

I flip the tape and a saxophone streams through my speakers
I keep my windows down and breath deep
I've been driving down this road too long
At least Now the suns peaking over the horizon
And I can see a town in the distance
Like (0)

Don't give me summer days
or brews that go down easy
I'll take harsh winter nights
with a double shot of whiskey

lay on your pristine beaches
let the shore be your quarry
as I dive the ocean depths
and chart new territory's

build a home and raise a family
So I know the pain is worth it
you can find me in the jungle
hunting down the serpent

keep your gentle breezes
take shelter and keep it warm
I only ask you don't forget me
as I face the raging storm

At the dive again
Familiar with every sin
Sipping whiskey I notice
A goddess with an *******
****.. here we go again
Tonight envy takes over

Across the bar exchanging glances
The *** is preoccupied with a waitress
Sending a drink squinting and smiling
She smiles back in that way that girls do
You know.. the look that says you've won
Tonight lust takes over

Finally he notices our tension
An argument erupts between them
Wonder if he knows Im her ex
Dont matter if he walks over fists will fly
Cant back down.. I ain't built that way
Tonight pride takes over

After a drunken clash the *** takes a seat
She takes his side and gives comfort
Kicked out the bar I take a walk
Wish I could say she wasn't worth it
We all know.. that would be a lie
Tonight loneliness takes over

Its like how you have that flag from your old country hanging there. It fills you with pride to know where you come from. Who your ancestors are and what kind of people they were. I don't have that. When I look into my past, all I see is pain. When I look past that, There is nothing but empty space. An endless void that seems to expand with my every step.

When I was still a boy, this filled me with rage. I tried to fight it. Telling myself that it didn't matter and that forward is the only direction that counts. It was a dream that I sold myself for most of my youth. When that dream was no longer convincing, I tried to fill the void. Fill it with any and every negative thing I could find. Things like greasy food, heavy drinking, witless brawling, raw *******, and of course hard drugs, In the end these were only distractions.

After facing the fatal consequences of my constant recklessness, I thought I would I explore the void. Figured if I traveled far enough, I would inevitably stumble upon a scrap of useful information and one good thing would lead to greener pastures. I trudged deeper into that void for longer than I care to remember. Got lost in its haze to the point I couldn't tell which way was up. I wanted to give in. Fall back into old habits and forget about my foolish endeavor. Erase all the wasted blood, sweat, tears and time. I wanted to be comfortable again. Who would blame me for that?

In the end my hunger for knowledge of self proved stronger than I could ever have imagined. Instead of running; Each day I chose to remind my self of the many hell's I have survived. I thought of all the test's I was sure to face in the future. This became my driving force.

I kept digging until finally I struck the truth I was looking for. For so long I thought I was being punished. That if there was a god, he surely hated me. Focusing only on the struggle, I never noticed how strong It made me. Until the day came I had to use it to protect someone I love.

That was the moment everything changed. When I stopped living for myself. I realized that men like me aren't meant to find peace. I was born to fight and suffer so that my brothers can breath easy. I know that I can take that pain because I have done it my entire life.  For my will is strong.

She pours in slowly as I watch from a distance
A darkened tone the reflection of a life well lived
I watch her splash and swirl
I watch young men's hearts fill with courage
I watch old men relive passed moments

Set down beside me I catch the softest scent of vanilla
An icy touch reveals to me the nature of our relationship
Slowly she leans into me
Pressed against my lips and tilting forward
An eternity passes before I'm allowed to drink her in

Sweet.. She ain't that
No sir this is something much more real
Full bodied and biting
Tearing away every ounce of ego
Devouring all that isn't me

A warm glow spreads from my chest and down into my belly
The senses of comfort and abandon take hold
The pain of past hells that normally haunt are pushed backwards
In this moment there is only her
In this moment I'd do anything for her

Shes gone and I already miss her
Hellfires spark catches flame and spreads
I try to stand but my knees disagree
The floors a good place to sleep
Maybe I'll dream of her

Another day
another train ride home
riding and watching the people go

scanning the crowd slowly i see her
shes catches me watching and i don't care
a glance would be disrespectful
staring is the only thing that makes sense
a woman like this must be appreciated deeply
taken in fully until you truly understand her spirit

she looks away with a shy smile
crossing her legs revealing smooth skin
dazed for a moment my heart racing
eyes trained on her thighs i give in

driving my way up her body
drifting round curves to curls
until sharply our eyes meet once more
Lord knows how long I can take this
i have to have her and it must be now
to deny this would be sin

in her eyes desire turns to sadness
blinking quickly as if to cry
standing and grabbing the cold metal pole
revealing a wedding ring to show me why

Getting up I stand close behind her
placing my hand just beneath her own
i lose my mind as she backs into me
good thing were close to my home

then suddenly the train stops
and she slips off into the crowd
i search for her desperately
but shes nowhere to be found

reaching the street i see her in the distance
and we share one last electrifying look
until the next train signals its coming
so I make my way back down

So this is what its come to
two men staring each other down
each poised to take the others life
strangely they both seem so calm

on one side is a wild boy
brash and temperamental
his lifestyle has borne many enemies
he hates the idea of hurting others
but he must protect those he loves

on the other is a cold man
calculating and decisive
his soul let the darkness take hold
he hates that hes numb to hurting others
but he must protect those he loves

neither has ever backed down
both fight for more than themselves
i have a final choice to make
only one man can walk away

so this is what its come to
barrel trained on my enemy
fearful eyes in their final moments
i must protect those i love
and strangely i feel so calm

It wasn't my intention to see her here tonight
She belongs to another man, I tell myself
since we're both here it won't hurt to take a look
And so I watch her hips sway to the bands slow soul

It wasn't my intention to grind into her rhythm
With one look her eyes beckoned that I come home
She belongs to another man, I tell myself
And so lose myself in effortless conversation

It wasn't my intention to kiss her
The words stopped flowing and we couldn't stop staring
And so I lose myself in the taste of her
Tonight she is mine, I tell myself

Tell me what is it you know of the darkness. Have you ever felt the electric shock run up your spine and freeze your muscles as you watch the end of your life unfold before you

Tell me have you prayed to every god in hopes that one might abolish your shame. Sitting on your knees until the blood pools onto the floor beneath you and dries becoming sticky.

Tell me how far have you gone to numb that pain. Have you picked fights with terrible odds and reveled in the drunken mess you've created.

Tell me have you ever escaped on the slimmest chance and tasted how thin the air becomes when you realize just how fragile it all can be.

Tell me do you live for that moment? I do.