Have you ever loved someone so much it hurts?
So much that the cavity inside your chest aches and burns?
That the voices inside your head tear and scream
Until that one person is back inside your arms?
I have.
It's been two years,
My chest still aches and burns,
My head still tears and screams.
Memories flooding
Of that spring we spent under the stars.
"So I guess this is goodbye."

My heart dropped and then it fell.
"Don't worry, you're mine now"
Was all it took.
Five simple words,
Thrown together only to make you my first.
I still remember the spring we spent under the stars.
Long conversations and even longer nights,
Never imagining my life with out you in it.
The stars that brought us together are still here,
But two years later we are nowhere near.
What did I do to make you despise me?
"My life doesn't need you"
Five simple words,
That I wish I said first.

If I'd have known goodnight would have meant goodbye,
I would have tried to kiss you a little longer that night.

If I'd have known goodnight would have meant goodbye,
I would have held your face as I kissed you that night.

If I'd have known goodnight would have meant goodbye,
I would have rubbed the back of your neck a little bit longer that night.

If I'd have known goodnight would have meant goodbye,
I would have held your hand in the taxi home that night.

If I'd have known goodnight would have meant goodbye,
I would have intertwined my fingers through your hair one last time,
We both liked that.

If I'd have known goodnight would have meant goodbye,
I would have wrapped my arms around your neck,
With an embrace making our bodies become one.

If I'd have known goodnight would have meant goodbye,
I would have looked deep into your eyes again,
Just to catch them looking back at me,
Maybe for just a little bit longer.

If I'd have known goodnight would have meant goodbye,
I would have never let the night end.

The first time since him I fell.
I had fallen faster than before.
Never believing in love at first sight,
Until I met you.
Instant connection,
A bond between two broken people,
Attracted to each others weakness.
Now that bond is broken.
Words spoken are empty.
"But everything was fine a week ago"

I thought of you today.
The first time we tried to do it.
You were so scared.
Lying on top of me,
You held my face as you kissed me.
I was so scared,
I had to get off of you.
We were both so scared.
We looked at each other,
Laughed.
Held each other.
Two completely imperfect people
Who only saw complete perfection in each other.
Did you forget that too?

I think the worst part of this is
How quickly you have forgotten.
How quickly I have been replaced.
My chest,
Still remaining an open wound.